John Hart. Captain, John Hart.
The title wasn't his, it had been stolen and immediately incorporated, as so many other things in all the years of his life, that were also so many he couldn't even remember; or at least, it appeared to have been a lot longer than a human body - an extremely sexy human body, like he would argue - could resist. Captain sounded good, matched his jacket and gave him a whole new horizon.
A loner by choice and with a sexual appetite the size of the universe by nature, John Hart - Captain, John Hart - had seen, done and fucked everything the galaxies had to offer. He did not like to bond or make partnerships, unless it was strictly necessary and/or presented him with a whole sort of advantages, financial or physical.
As a Time Agency employee, John had faced the opportunity of his life to get exactly what he always pursued, which was everything. It was easy money, and a supersonic watch that would take him anywhere he wished in the universe, at any period of its existence. What else could anyone ever desire for?
Nothing, except for a cool outfit, obviously, to match his new life ambitions.
Without the Time Agency, in other hand, John felt compelled to test all the power of his sex appeal, his capacity for trickery and sharpened perception for time and place for self-benefit. Life with a powerful watch could be very amusing, but it had its compensation amends.
One of those compensations was to never have roots anywhere, nor bond, emotionally or not, to anyone. John had been apart from his own origins for so long that it appeared to be nothing more than distant vague memories, nearly oniric, in the deep of his mind. A place he could access in those frugal rare moments, in which he could lay down and rest, close his eyes, and wait for Mr. Sleep to work his magic.
All his relationships were built over lies and personal motivations, usually to guarantee his survival. Some, few, and more precious, woke certain feelings John could barely name on him. John Hart was, however, and above all, a jerk by nature, incapable of entrusting himself to anyone. Even if he wanted. And, occasionally, every time all planets got aligned, John Hart did want.
The bonds were destroyed by his nature, always demanding the man remained as a loner. That, from his point of view, was the only way for one to take profit from all the colors and flavors the universe had to offer - and, oh, they ere so many. Especially when you were the possessor of a phenomenal body and the sagacity of John Hart.
After all, a loner would never survive without the support of very well trained trickery skills.
Aside from being a loner, a jerk and a crook, Captain John Hart was also a survivor.
Though extremely proud of his own methods and conquests, eternally flattering himself for all the beds, bathrooms, chairs, cars, alleys, tables, cells and spaceships he had been welcome to visit and paid with pleasure, there still were those moments in which John questioned his own intemperate life style, and wished, deep down, that somewhere out in the universe someone would be missing his graceful presence. In those embarrassing and very recurring times when only a miracle emerged as salvation from the fateful destiny that chased after him, and occasionally would get to his pretty self, John wished he would actually be missed.
He started as a loner, lived at the fullest as a loner, and would die the same way. It made sense.
The counting of the years, in John Hart's life, often blended and entangled with his wild and indecipherable personality. There was no beginning, middle and end, like everybody else. He did not belong at any time line, and could be, however, at all and any of them. Depending on the necessity or the range of the damage John could live five years in two weeks, for example. Age was something apart from his identity. The only and inconvenient way to notice the years going by affecting his human basic yet often forgotten constitution were the grey hair and the wrinkles at the corner of his eyes.
The price of being irresistible, John would say.
Only once had John met someone up to his existence. Someone who concealed and lied just as much, or even more, than he did; who wanted just as much, or even more; who lived the same promiscuous life - at that point, they definitely were a match.
Captain Jack Harkness was a title thief like himself, and probably the only person John could've joined, in his entire life. Partners is crime, in impudence and, mainly, in bed. The last factor being directly related to the prior ones: the chemistry they found to escape and get themselves into problems was impressive.
Only not as impressive as the marvelous, splendid and incomparable sex.
While partners at the Time Agency, the two spent together what, for them, represented five years. Five years following a single time line; five years watching the sun rise and fall, day after day. Five whole years watching a same familiar face.
It was the closest John ever got from a relationship. Although, when it comes to John Hart and Jack Harkness, the word relationship had to come in between many horns.
John kept with the maximum of affection his own standards allowed the days he lived by Jack. In moments of emotional weakness, rare thing, they would permit themselves to make confidences they would never dare making to anyone else. Jack knew his secrets, and he knew Jack's. Tedium, most of the time, led them to talk about embarrassing or terribly tragic aspects of their lives. The kinds of things that simply didn't match their stylish coats or over the top attitudes of the daily routine. John imagined that was how married people felt, bored out of their minds, enough to share their entire lives with another being, in hope this desperate act would emotionally bond them to their partners and make it mean something - and, obviously, get time to pass by faster.
But, for John, emotionally didn't exist.
John decided to stay in the Time Agency, even when Jack left throughout the space, adrift, willing to put at test all his aptitude to live as a legitimate rascal. Destiny was setting them apart, but only temporarily.
At first, John thought he had a lucky touch. Later on, he realized how much it had actually been a stroke of misfortune. Destiny placed Jack Harkness in his path once more. But not exactly. Unintentionally, John found what Jack spent all his life in search of, without ever getting any clues.
Jack had no idea how lucky he was.
That man was a nightmare. And a very vengeful one. From victim and naive he had nothing anymore; from the scared and lost little boy, only a frugal minor physical resemblance. He was distressed, and willing to do anything to get his revenge. And by chance, crossing his path, he found someone who could take him exactly to what he sought. In other circumstances, he would’ve been glad to serve a handsome man such as this one. But not under his terms.
John Hart was the one who used the others, the unscrupulous who never spared efforts in his own benefit. His soul had no more sense of ethics, moral or honor. Not that those aspects had ever been of any relevance in his life. But, even someone like him, in all his shamelessness, had certain few codes of conduct, all about to be completely shattered by the boy’s ambitions.
And Captain John could do no more than waiting.
John Hart was never the fussy type when it came to his conquests. With a taste often classified as exotic, basically anything could have a charm by that man’s eyes. Some more, some less. He had his top five list, of course - but that list changed according to the situation. An old widow, pink skin, with three eyes and a lot of money, quickly got to number one at his personal ranking. He slept with one once, ‘cause desperate moments required desperate actions. The sex wasn’t all that bad, but the bag with money and precious artifacts had been all that good, for sure.
Among necklaces, bracelets, crowns, scepters and precious stones, that were immediately transformed into money and very well paid prostitutes, a ring had been kept in its original form. A round shaped stone, slightly green. Ugly. And harmless.
Apparently harmless.
John found a localizer amongst the old lady’s jewelry. Very clever, indeed. The widow left it there, disguised in the middle of so many other shiny things that jumped to the eye, to be able to find it, in case she was stolen. She wasn’t counting, probably, that the thief would be someone with John Hart’s astuteness. He managed to activate and deactivate the localizer as he wished, as well as modifying its signal.
The blessed thing had saved his ass in quite a few opportunities. A little kiss and a mental thanks in memory of the old lady, and life goes on. But not even his loyal adventure companion seemed enough to rescue him this time.
John learnt to never, ever, doubt life’s capacity to give spectacular spins and catch him completely off guard.
Being found by the Doctor and his companion was something that not even in his most highly refined erotic dreams he could’ve imagined. He met the man, many years before, at a quick passage through Earth. The Doctor was one of those incomprehensible mad people with an intense crush for the most boring planet in the whole universe. Beyond, far beyond John’s capability to understand why so many people decided to dedicate themselves to mountains of metal, earth and water so poorly utilized. A place with potential, certainly. But terribly bad administrated.
The Doctor was a lot more than his original wish. When he activated the localizer, he didn’t really hope that someone would be stupid and crazy enough to land on that destroyed morbid planet. The smart ones should know that there were no chances of coming out alive. The Doctor, however, was beyond any labels.
It was exactly what he needed to buy himself some time. Soon, that demon boy would be back, to find out that he had lost his passport to revenge. John would be hunted down to the end of the universe, by the one who now had his sacred beautiful watch. Eventually they would meet, John was sure of that. Not even the universe was big enough to stop that hallucinated. He was almost as strong and powerful as a cheated wife. The power angry women had was something that never ceased to amaze John.
But it would be of no harm a trip across the universe side by side with the oh-so-famous Doctor. And, of course, his adorable and sexy assistant. John’s type of assistant. And Jack’s as well. Eyecandy was a pain in the ass, most of the time, for reminding the Doctor, insistently, that he was not an enough trustable figure to be inside the TARDIS, as a travel companion. He couldn’t judge the boy, really, for the memories of their last encounter were probably very vivid on the cutie’s memory. Little did he know that John was incapable of doing anything to harm or prejudice the Doctor or his TARDIS; his life also depended on the welfare of them both.
It wasn’t all that bad, after all, to be constantly watched by Eycandy. It was never unpleasant to be watched by a handsome figure.
On his original top five, Eyecandy would definitely be there.
And annoying him became the Captain’s number one sport. Ianto was a very centered and responsible young man, with all the neat suits and the duty sense. He had a sharpened tongue, it was true, always ready to give an ironic or sarcastic well-humored answer to his provoking which the Captain found delightful. John was never sick of taking all his chances to amuse Ianto with his vast collection of pick-up lines, specially selected and tested in all his years of experience across the universe, just to see his annoyed pretty face and harsh comments.
Eyecandy was sheer fun.
The only thing he didn’t know was why had the boy decided to abandon his chief and the fluffy team that followed him up and down Cardiff. For someone with all the responsibility sense Eyecandy had, it seemed a pretty bold and irresponsible enough decision. Either he was deeply hurt, or the Doctor had more sex appeal than John could’ve imagined at first. In his head, those were the only things that could motivate a person to make decisions. Either that, or survival. Eyecandy was obviously not involved on a matter of life or death.
And, in the TARDIS, that was the only forbidden subject.
Time went by, and John stood by. Even under Ianto’s initial protests, and all his suspicion, even if the Doctor knew perfectly well what kind of man he was, e even not really waiting for acceptance, John stood. One, two, three, four weeks. A whole month. With the same familiar faces. Revisiting planets, artificial moons and completely different and random time lines. It was almost, just almost, having his watch his back. Almost because if he had his watch back, he wouldn’t be for over a month without the delicious pleasure of sex. But even under critical circumstances John knew what was best for him in order to not risk his own marvelous skin - or at least delay it as much as he could, until there were no more alternatives. He was like a prisoner asking for his last meal before walking down the death aisle - John Hart was having his last weeks of peace. Not his kind of peace, but still. Other people’s peace, into which he had meddled without asking for permission.
Being with the Doctor was the only way to guarantee he would not be found - just yet. The safest place in the universe to be.
For the second time in his life, Captain John Hart was familiarizing with something that wasn’t himself. And, for his astonishment and even desperation, he was enjoying it. Enjoying the days at the TARDIS, the not foreseen and highly life threatening confusions the Doctor always seemed to get himself entangled in - indeed, troubles sought that TARDIS like he sought after notorious rounded behinds. He thought he used to live in constant trouble, the Doctor, however, beat all his records, with the slight difference that he, by himself, was a trouble, and the Doctor, usually, was the solution. John liked the stories constantly being told around the ship, the laughter, the adrenalin rushing through his veins and the company he had. It was nice having company. From the Doctor, and Eyecandy. The boy, in fact, turned out to be a lot more than the stupid boring human he thought at a first moment, and John could, now, even if on a very distorted way, understand why Jack had connected himself so intensely to that metal hub under the ground on Earth.
Damn it... He was liking all that.
While traveling without a fixed destination, the TARDIS' radar got hold of a moon the Doctor had never seen before. Nearly affronted, he decided to land in there and take a good look around. Apparently, his pride was brutally hurt when he realized there were planets and civilizations he had never visited in person before. Artificially created moons, however, were constantly being launched into space around 10 or 20 thousand years ahead of Ianto's time, each of them carrying a different civilization, trying to escape the horrors of war or just recreate a climate and life condition long destroyed at their original homeland. Humans were one of those.
This one, with the name of Kryptos, was a fragment of the life the yonis used to take at their planet before the beginning of the great war, responsible for demolishing the whole place and annihilating half of its population.
They heard the story from one of the villagers, nicely receiving them for a drink at what seemed to be his bar. Ianto realized why the scientist responsible for the project had felt the need to recreate the place he used to live: it was beautiful, and somewhat oniric. A soft blue grass covered the ground, as the sky scintillated from a light blue to a pale pink, with sparkling diamonds. There were hundreds of little round shaped houses, that reminded Ianto of igloos, but more cozy. The creatures inhabitating it, however, were not that adorable: most of them had eight legs. Their head was somewhat gigantic, and the number of eyes varied from one to six, on different points of the head. There were the green ones, and the reddish ones. Very friendly people, yes, but definitely not attractive.
After a perfectly nice day, getting to know the place and its inhabitants better, the Doctor decided it was about time they took off for more important things other than making friends and listening to nice stories of the old planet. Ianto agreed, and went to find Captain John, an activity that became part of his routine ever since the man joined the party.
"That was absolutely mean of you, Eyecandy. I'm so profoundly disappointed." John said, while they made their way back to the TARDIS.
"I'm so very sorry about interrupting your deep anthropological research on the local population, but we have to go." the Welshman answered not demonstrating much interest or solidarity towards the other man's complaint, walking right behind the Doctor, with his hands stuffed in his trousers pockets.
"It was a date." John corrected him. "She's a very nice girl, who now thinks I have a wife who answers by the name of Eyecandy."
"I did not sound like your wife. Neither in this nor in any other planet."
"He's right, you know. It was more like your mother." the Doctor commented, getting a laugh out of Captain John, and an annoyed look from Ianto, as they finally reached the TARDIS.
As soon as they got in, Ianto and the Doctor started checking the ship's controllers and preparing it for taking off again.
"You are gonna have to pay me back, you know." John continued the conversation, leaning against the round control panel behind him, arms crossed, while talking to a Ianto who was incredibly fun to annoy.
Ianto used to point a finger at him every time he did something like that, and then remind the Doctor why they should not take him with. As the other two worked and tried to set the TARDIS for traveling, John just sat around taking their attention from the important stuff.
This time, the Welshman just sighed.
"Actually, I think you should thank me for interrupting your date."
"Why is that?" John asked, arching him a curious eyebrow.
Ianto lifted his head to look at John's face for a second. "She was an octopus." he said, like the comment was very obvious, before looking down at the board again.
"Show some respect. The lady's a very sexy octopus." John corrected him again.
"With eight tentacles coming from under her skirt."
"Oh, you have no idea the wonders she can do with those tentacles." He smirked, mischievously staring at the Welshman. Both Ianto and the Doctor stopped what they were doing to take a good, frowning look at the other man, who never ceased to amaze. "What? You two never tried the tentacles?"
The Doctor laughed. The three weeks they had spent with John on board, since rescuing him from a prison in a dark, destroyed planet, had been extremely interesting. Ianto resisted to even chat with him for as long as he could, not trusting for one second, and blaming the Doctor for doing it so easily. But not even the careful and protective Welshman could resist his charisma. The man knew how to have fun, that was for sure. The Doctor had never found him one of the most reliable examples of creatures on space, but, at that point, he knew John needed them much more than they needed - or wanted - him around.
"You have to stop being so discriminative, Eyecandy. I don't care about birthplace, language, skin color or number of legs. The thing with you, Earth people, is that you can only see beauty in the one's like yourself, with boring two legs, and one perfectly proportional head." he ended his fervid and truthful speech, with a determined look on his face.
"You convinced me." the Doctor spoke.
"Oh, yes. Us, disgusting one headed humans. Down with that." Ianto added, thinking that, at some point in a very distant future, speeches like the one's from John would probably be heard in every corner around the universe, when people started fighting for equality between outer space races. It was indeed a very good cause, but not when the main objective of it was to have equality on bedding all kinds of creatures.
"Humans are the most tedious and predictable creatures on this universe. That being told by someone with a large amount of experience. Not everyone is lucky enough to be born like that." and he pointed a finger to himself. "Nor with that nice ass of yours, Eyecandy. So, I kind of have to start considering all of my possibilities. And trust me, it's worth it." John had a large suggestive smile stretched across his lips, as he stared at a somewhat astounded and somewhat incredulous Ianto.
"Ok..." The for some reason almost offended human spoke a few seconds in delay. "Please, from now on, keep your dirty wet thoughts to yourself." and he returned to focus on his work at the control table.
"Well, since you mentioned..." John inclined his body to get nearer the boy. "My wet thoughts, right now, involve a control panel, some tentacles, and you." John's voice sounded husky while he said it, and his eyes... Oh, those dirty narrowed eyes getting to Ianto's nerves.
The boy placed both his hands at the panel, abruptly stopping his work and looking at the Doctor. "Remind me again why we still have him on board."
The Doctor sighed.
"The two of you should seriously consider getting a room" and then carelessly spoke, occupied by something far more important than John's not-so-secret desires.
"Well, thank you!" John gratefully spoke. "I have been telling him that since I got here. See? Even the Doctor agrees with me."
"That's treason." Ianto said on a hurtful tone, turning around and going towards the stairs leading to the TARDIS' second floor. He was done setting the controls, and he sure as hell could use sometime away from John Hart and his provocative and annoying conversation.
John was, of course, having fun, and perhaps trying to see how far he could actually get with the cheesy pick-up lines he had collected from years and years of a carefree life and not much discriminatory taste throughout the space. Ianto wondered which one he had used to get to Jack, concluding that probably none. All it took for people like Jack and John to end up on the same bed was breathe the same air. All in all, the man was almost a nice guy, sometimes. The type you would like to have at your party, to guarantee your guests would never get bored. As a last resort, John could easily get on a table and do some strip. Never boring.
But actually finding him nice did not change Ianto's primary opinion on the guy: way over the top, terrible taste for color combination and totally unreliable.
Half the way through the stairs, Ianto heard the Doctor's voice again. "We are gonna have to stop at Cardiff." he said, and by the sound of the word, Ianto stopped, and turned around. He walked down the steps, and stood near the Doctor, staring at him very seriously.
"What?"
The Doctor lifted his eyebrows to face his companion. He was ready for the reaction just as soon as he realized what the yellow light sign on the panel meant. "Something about this place's fundamental bases sucked way too much energy out of the TARDIS. We need to reload, therefore, Cardiff."
John's eyebrows arched in curiosity as he watched the younger man's reaction. It was Ianto's standard reaction for anything involving confronting what ever he left behind on Earth.
Ianto paused and breathed, deeply.
"Thousands of years in the future, the whole universe ahead, and you tell me the only gas station you have is Cardiff?" he calmly asked.
"It's the best one."
"Is it absolutely necessary?" Ianto asked, locking eyes with his boss. They had been in Cardiff just two months prior, for Ianto considered too soon to be back already. Of course there was no schedule when traveling with the Doctor, anything could happened, at any time, and they just had to be prepared. But he was not ready to be back there yet.
"Alright" the Doctor finally answered, much for Ianto's relief, after a brief moment of considering his possibilities. "There is somewhere else we can go."
"Thank you" his companion honestly said, turning around once more to continue his way to the second floor.
The Doctor reprogrammed the coordinates at the TARDIS, and raised his eyes to look at the oddly silent Captain.
John had his arms crossed , staring blankly at the other man.
"What?" the time agent asked.
"Aren't you going to do your 'thing'?"
"What 'thing'?"
"Mean smartass comments about Ianto's motivations for not wanting to go back to Cardiff. Isn't that what you do?"
The Captain paused, blinked his eyes, and calmly answered. "Nope."
"What happened to you?" the Doctor arched a curious eyebrow at the other man, who shrugged.
"I happen to agree with Eyecandy."
"Since when?"
"I just think he has a point."
"And what is that point, precisely, in your opinion?"
Again, he thought before answering.
"A very good one."
The Doctor shook his head, and got his hands at work to take the TARDIS to his B plan gas station. It wasn't the best of the places for energizing the TARDIS, however he could see how and why Ianto did not wish to be back at Cardiff so soon. It was more about being uncomfortable around the things he left unsolved than facing the people he left behind. And the Doctor, having done this a lot, understood exactly why he would rather avoid it unless absolutely necessary.
John walked to the bottom of the staircase, and looked up, leaning against the wall. His eyes scanned what he could catch of the second floor in search of the boy who had just gone up the stairs. He could see half a Ianto comfortably resting at an armchair. The boy had his eyes closed, probably trying to get some rest for a while. The Doctor and John did not have that much need to rest. They both barely slept; for the Doctor, it was part of his race's routine, time lords never slept, unless they needed a real big amount of energy; for John, he just liked the night way too much to spend it asleep, and as the years went by and he became less and less human, and more part of the universe, he just stopped feeling the need to sleep. Once in a while, however, it felt good to lay down his head and take off to dream world. But a man with the guilt and anxieties he carried over his shoulder, it was way too hard to sleep.
For Eyecandy, was probably complicated being around people who never needed to rest. Days never ended, time nerve stopped, for neither John or the Doctor, so Eyecandy had to keep going, until his body felt numb and his eyes refused to remain open. It wasn't rare to find Ianto laying at some corner, completely exhausted.
John thought he looked terribly adorable asleep. It took him a lot of self control not to harass the boy. Under normal circumstances, he would. But something held him back, even after months in the space without sex, and it wasn't just the presence of the Doctor, since John was a huge admirer of voyeurism himself.
The same thing that kept him from harassing the boy was the thing that got him to not want to go back to Cardiff as much as Eyecandy.
He actually respected him. And respect was something very few people got from John Hart. Two of them, by coincidence or not, were with him that moment.
He respected that neat, centered, way too responsible boy as much as to puzzle him. As much as to not want him gone. And as much as to know that if they went back to Cardiff just yet, probabilities were he would be gone.
John was having a good time, or something like that. He wasn't quite capable of naming it, or even cared to. All he knew was it wasn't going to last for too long, and he wanted it to be exactly how it was. It was one of those rare, few times when he just wanted things to remain as they were. It felt right.
Going to Cardiff implicated Ianto wouldn't be around any longer, and he would, most probably, be found a lot earlier than he wished.
So Ianto had a point. A very good point. And maybe the Doctor couldn't quite catch that.
Well... He could.
TBC
