All in all, Jon wasn't particularly shocked when the guys took him aside and explained that Ryan was a wizard.  He'd been filling in for a couple months by then, and he'd thought the talk was going to be about him joining the band permanently.  As it turned out, he was still kind of right - the offer was just contingent on his reaction to Spencer looking at him seriously and saying, "There are two things you need to know before we go any further.  One, magic is real.  And two, Ryan is a wizard."

Jon got that he was supposed to laugh; to not believe it or to at least be freaked out.  But really, it explained a lot.

For example, it went a long way to explaining why sometimes Jon would hear Ryan swearing with surprise and alarm, usually because he saw a spider or a fly, or because he'd been woken up by the fangirl alarm, and then a few seconds later Jon could swear he saw a strange pale version of Spencer glide byeven though he was sure Spencer was off the bus or asleep in his own bunk.  Well, that made sense after Spencer explained what a patronus was and that he was Ryan's, anyway.

"Usually they're animals, but..." Spencer shrugged as if to say, you know Ryan.

Jon nodded.  Wizard or no, he knew Ryan Ross.  Usual was the last word Jon would choose to describe him.

Spencer continued, "It's actually a pretty tricky piece of magic, and not technically intended for spiders or when you're bored," he rolled his eyes fondly, "but he's always been able to do it."

Ryan shrugged. "It was the first bit of magic I ever did.  My dad always told me I was going to end up a squib, but one afternoon when I was about seven and my dad was..." he waved his hand and made an "oh, well, you know" sort of face.  "I just closed my eyes and thought of Spence and there he - it- was."  Ryan smiled at Spencer with quiet confidence, with love.  "My dad was so shocked he left me alone for almost a month."

Jon liked that Ryan had less serious things to be scared of now, but whatever was upsetting him, he liked that Ryan had a way to protect himself even more.  If there was anyone Jon thought deserved to have magical protection on their side, it was Ryan.

The whole wizard thing also explained - and was possibly the only thing that could - Ryan's fashion choices.

"He never really learned how to dress like a Muggle," Spencer explained, regarding the rosevest.

"He really misses his robes," Brendon added, nodding to Ryan's ruffly shirt and several scarves.

Quite frankly, the only thing about it that really threw Jon was discovering Harry Potter was some kind of a documentary or biography or whatever.

"It's more of a dramatization than factual account of actual events," Ryan clarified sulkily.  "He's not really that good at Quidditch."

"More importantly," Spencer added, rolling his eyes at Ryan, "The ghost writer altered the timeline.  All that stuff actually happened in the early 90s.  I think the first book came out about two years after Voldermort was defeated?"  He nodded to himself.  "There was a lot of contact between wizards and Muggles during his return to power and it was decided the books should be written for the Muggle world - and passed off as fictional children's stories - as a way to add a greater sense of fantasy to the all-too-similar reality."  Seeing Jon's face Spencer waved his hand and said vaguely, "But like.... everything's cool.  Now, I mean.  He's gone and all that."

Ryan nodded to confirm Spencer's report, although he looked a bit like Spencer knew more about this than he did.  Jon wasn't particularly surprised by this.  Knowing things everyone else didn't was Spencer's specialty.  This was particularly true when it came to information he needed to know to protect Ryan.

So really, other than being suddenly, immensely relieved that Harry and his pals had defeated Voldermort after all, learning Ryan was a wizard was pretty much no big deal.  And his initial, slightly intrigued "huh" was enough to earn him a permanent spot in the band, so overall Jon considered it a positive development.

His favorite part, though, was how much more comfortable Ryan was around him once Jon knew.  He'd always liked Ryan, just as much as Spencer and Brendon, maybe more, but had never been able to shake the feeling Ryan was keeping something from him.  Was showing Jon only a fraction of himself.  It was nice to know he wasn't just insecure and paranoid.  Just as it was a relief to know that there was a reason Ryan had been holding back other than that Ryan just didn't really like Jon that much.  That would have sucked.

As it was, Jon was a little bummed that Ryan was dating Spencer.  That was the other thing they'd told him in the whole, "Ryan's magic; join our band" conversation.  Not that Jon didn't like Spencer, or begrudged him his happiness.  Spencer kicked ass.  And he totally got it - their thing.  It would have made sense anyway, even if you didn't throw the whole secret wizarding society angle into the mix.  Adding that to what Jon already knew or had pieced together about Ryan's childhood, Jon felt like Ryan would have made less sense if he didn't have a magical ghost version of Spencer to protect him when the real Spencer wasn't around.  And if you felt like that about a guy, it was really no wonder you'd be dating him if you could.  And Spencer was nothing if not eager to give Ryan what he wanted.

So it made too much sense for Jon to actually have a problem with it, with them, but that said, he felt he was still entitled to be kind of sad about it.  After all, it wasn't his fault Ryan was pretty and talented and apparently authentically magical. 

He never mentioned his feelings on the subject to them, of course, but he did confess to Brendon a few months after he officially joined the band.  They were high at the time, or Jon thinks he probably wouldn't have admitted it.  That was the sort of thing that tended to get people kicked out of bands.  Although he didn't think that had been Brent's issue.

But instead of getting mad, Brendon groaned and said, "Dude, I know.  I've had a crush on Spencer since the Summer League days.  But they're just so fucking perfect for each other."  He shrugged philosophically and took another bong rip.  "Whattaya gonna do?"

Jon knew Brendon was being rhetorical, but he answered him anyway.  "So far?  Pine and stare at him kind of creepily sometimes when he's sleeping."  Ryan was such a good sleeper.  Not in that he slept particularly well, but in that he looked particularly, painfully, beautiful when he did.

Again, instead of finding this news disturbing, Brendon nodded sympathetically and actually bumped fists with Jon.

"Man, I hear you.  Spencer does this thing?  He's not talking exactly, it's more like he's counting - you know, for the drums, but in his sleep."  He sighed.  "It kills me."

"Dude - Ryan can fly."

Brendon shrugged.  "With a broom."


The next day though, Brendon came to Jon in his bunk (Ryan and Spencer were doing an interview) and said, "Honestly, I'm really kind of in love with both of them at this point.  They're sort of a matched set, you know?"

Jon nodded.  He did know.  But he was trying to deal with one case of unrequited love at a time.  Wizards were one thing, but there was only so much a guy could take.

Brendon gave him a quick sideways glance before ducking his head and saying, "I'm pretty much in love with you too, by the way.  I mean... you're Jon."

As it turned out, that didn't come as much of a shock either.  Jon nodded again and reached out to grab Brendon's twitching hand.  He squeezed firmly.

"And you're Brendon."

Brendon smiled and squeezed back.  It didn't really solve anything, but it was still nice to know.

• 
  

So Ryan was a wizard and Spencer, Brendon, and Jon were all in love with him.  Jon jokingly suggested that there was a connection between the these facts and for the first time, Brendon got genuinely angry with him.

"He's not like that," Brendon said tightly, glaring at his hands.

Jon quickly stammered a retraction, "Dude, I know."

Brendon continued glaring.

"I know that, Brendon, really."

Brendon held out for another minute and then nodded, satisfied.

"Was that..." Jon sighed.  "Felt like I kind of hit a nerve there."

Brendon chewed on his lip uncertainly for awhile before answering.  "It's just... Ryan's kind of like - on the run?  Like he's a, I don't know, a magical fugitive or something.  Well, not really but - he left, you know?  Which you're not supposed to do.  They have laws and stuff about it, but Ryan left anyway.  Like I left the Mormons but only - with more magic."  He flapped his hands in frustration.  "I'm explaining this wrong."

"Start again," Jon suggested softly.

Brendon nodded, collecting himself.  "His dad wasn't in the army - not our army anyway.  But he got fucked up all the same, you know, fighting the... dark wizards," Brendon shot Jon a mildly suspicious glare, like he was daring Jon to laugh.  Jon just leaned in, concerned interest on his face.  "So there was - he doesn't really like it, magic.  Ryan, I mean.  Like, you've noticed how he never really does stuff?  He can - he's really good, I think - but he doesn't like it.  Except for the patronus thing and that's just because that's Spencer.  Some stuff he can't control though, like Legilimancy. Which is like, why he does that creepy blank staring thing sometimes.  He doesn't mean to hear what people are thinking but sometimes he just does.  It kind of makes him zone out a little."  Brendon shook himself as if to get back on topic, "Okay, so he can do the magic but he doesn't like to because his dad would, well... let's just say some stuff is a lot easier to cover up if you've got magic up your sleeve.  The magical community in Vegas is actually pretty large, but it's spread out - no one's too connected.  Ryan went to an all-magic school; the whole Catholic thing was a cover.  But he didn't make friends.  Him and Spencer met though - that story is the same and so... I guess cause of Spencer... the non-magical community, Muggles , always felt safer to Ryan than the magical one.  When he turned 17 - that really is when wizards come of age - he broke from his roots, left home, vowed to stop doing magic.  So... I mean, I'm telling you this because you need to know.  That - what you said before - it's just not the kind of joke you can make around him.  I wouldn't try it around Spencer either.  It's just... he's not like that.  He hates wizards who are like that.  He would never use his powers to manipulate people.  To hurt them."

Jon took a steadying breath, taking Brendon's words in and making sure he meant it when he said, "I know."

Brendon remained tensed for a minute before smiling and relaxing against Jon's chest.

"I figured you did," he said happily, his obvious relief saying otherwise.

Jon closed his eyes and pushed his face into Brendon's hair, trying to calm himself down.

"Jon?"  Brendon asked worriedly, when Jon didn't succeed.

He took another soothing breath before he ground out, "Let's just say it's a good thing Ryan's dad is already dead."

Brendon flinched in Jon's arms and burrowed deeper into Jon's chest.  "I hear that."


It took some work, piecing through the parts of Ryan's life-story that were true and the ones that were fabricated to cover for or distract from his magical nature.  If he asked Ryan, or Spencer or Brendon, they were usually willing to tell him, but he liked to figure at least some of it out on his own.  Because he knew Ryan***;*** because he paid attention.

It was true, for example, that Ryan had gone through a serious internet camwhoring phase in his early teens.  But the real reason he had done it was because of the way non-magical pictures fascinated him, the way the things in them stayed where they were, where he could keep an eye on them. 

He had also, as the story went, tracked Pete down first using livejournal, but had in fact used magic to find Pete's real e-mail.  That was something Ryan told Jon himself.  He admitted it stiffly, almost like a warning.  But Jon remembered what Brendon said, and more than that, he had seen pictures of that Ryan.  Maybe it took being a photographer or maybe you had to actually know Ryan as he was now, but Jon wasn't about to pass judgment on that boy.  Angry, desperate - all he had done was give himself a little push, a little leg up and he had let his talent and that of his band do the rest.  Jon told Ryan so, if not in so many words, and Ryan smiled like Jon had given him the perfect present.  Ryan could get pretty excited sometimes about the simplest of things.  Jon wished he could do bigger things to make Ryan smile at him, but he would take them however he could get them.

It was also true that they kicked Brent out of the band, but it wasn't because he was kind of a shitty bass player.

"We still let Ryan be in the band, don't we?"  Spencer snorted, when asked.

He had in fact been kicked out for the same reason Jon was allowed to stay.  He too had been told about Ryan's abilities but had reacted rather differently.

"First he freaked," Brendon rolled his eyes.  Then his face grew dark.  "But he got over it.  And then he kept wanting Ryan to do stuff for him - just little stuff at first, fix a string on his bass or accio the remote but when Ryan told him no he'd get... prickly, I guess, and it just... Ryan told him to stop asking and he didn't so he had to go.  That was it."

Interestingly, Brendon didn't say this like a warning, just an unhappy statement of fact.  Jon supposed, with a certain degree of satisfaction, that he had already passed that particular test.


Jon hoped he was right to believe he wouldn't have done anything about his feelings for Ryan if Ryan hadn't start doing things first. 

He'd planned on using Brendon as his guide, his comfort. After all, Brendon had loved what he couldn't have far longer than Jon and he had never let it make him selfish, never let it hurt Ryan or Spencer.  Jon wanted to be good to them like that, like Brendon was.  And he wanted to be good to Brendon, too.  He was a little slow on that score, where Brendon was concerned, but now that it had been pointed out, when he looked at Brendon it was all Jon could see.  Behind Brendon's childlike enthusiasm for Disney princesses and propensity to jump up and down as his most common expression of excitement, there was a surprising serious, mature person.  Jon had always known Brendon had to be a lot more grown-up than he appeared, to have left home as young as he did, to lead the band as well as he did.  But it was only after Jon was let into the other parts of their world - the secrets of Ryan's that Brendon and Spencer were so careful to protect - that Jon really felt like he'd begun to know the real Brendon.  And the real Brendon was hard not to love.  He was smart and brave, endlessly protective and good at hiding just what he was projecting.

It wasn't just the magic that Brendon was so good at deflecting attention from, it was all the gaps in Ryan's life, his inability to talk about or make sense of seemingly mundane things.  Knowing these things about Ryan gave Jon renewed respect for Brendon's conduct in interviews especially - the effusive, slightly jack-ass way he filled up all the awkward moments before attention could call on Ryan and what he didn't know or couldn't say.  Spencer was great at that too, of course, in his own away - he'd had even more practice than Brendon.  But Brendon had a way of protecting Ryan that distracted people perfectly from what he was doing.  He fooled media and their tourmates alike and did it with an easy, goofy smile on his face.

He was so good even Ryan missed it sometimes, and that might have been the best part of all.  Ryan appreciated the protection, but it irked him that he needed it, it chafed at him, all the reminders of the ways he didn't quite fit.  Any time Brendon could shield him without Ryan feeling like a freak, like a liability to the band, was a victory in Jon's opinion.  the quiet, proud way Spencer would smile at Brendon those times confirmed to Jon that Spencer agreed.

Jon was learning from both of them in that area, learning to carry interviews and help ease relaxation out of Ryan at shows.  Shows where Ryan was particularly on edge - nervous as he already was from the performing itself - his emotions were volatile, and that was when he was most likely to release accidental magic.  There was only so much Spencer could do from behind his kit - beyond giving Ryan a solid wall of protective sound behind him.  So it fell largely to Brendon and Jon to watch out for Ryan on stage.  They arranged themselves on stage with that in mind and made shows elaborate and occasionally explosive, all to distract and amaze.  To make that commonplace, just in case Ryan's real magic found a way to come out.

So it was all going pretty well, over all.  The tour was a success and Jon and Brendon were generally successful at keeping Ryan suitably relaxed.  Jon was finding his groove in interviews and outside of the public eye things were going even better.  Jon was more in love with Ryan every day - but he was more in love with Spencer and Brendon every day too.  And even if he couldn't have Ryan and Spencer - he could have Brendon.  They could have each other.  It wasn't about settling, about replacements.  They loved each other even if they weren't the only ones they loved.

Real as it was, they didn't do much about it, didn't go very far.  Brendon was a compulsive cuddler which, when it came to Brendon, was something Jon was very into.  They slept better together, they also found.  And Brendon had lips that sometimes simply demanded to be kissed, but that was really the extent of it between them.

But it was enough to get noticed, although Jon wanted to believe it wasn't the only reason Ryan started climbing into Jon's bunk, some nights, before Brendon could.  Why Ryan was suddenly inserting himself into more and more of their cuddles, his hands clutching persistently onto both of them.  Jon watched, worried and confused, for Spencer's reaction, but he never seemed to have one.  Visibly, all things between him and Ryan remained the same and he continued to treat Brendon and Jon with the same mixture of exasperated affection and jokey meanness.

Jon and Brendon didn't discuss it amongst themselves, but when Jon noticed Brendon holding on a little tighter on the nights Ryan didn't beat him to it, Jon had no problem holding back.

Jon didn't say anything to Ryan either, not until the night Ryan slipped into Jon's bunk wearing nothing but worn boxers.  Ryan tucked himself against Jon silently, lying with his eyes open, his breath too carefully regulated to be natural.

Jon put a hand on Ryan's bare shoulder and began uncertainly,

"Ryan?"

Ryan shuddered slightly against Jon but didn't respond.

"You're okay here, Ryan - I want you here if that's... if that's what you need.  But I need to know what this is."  Jon spoke softly, keeping his voice even.

Ryan closed his eyes and clenched one of his fists before answering, "I don't know.  I guess I don't often feel like I'm qualified to gauge what's normal, or decent.  That I don't  know about people or how they should behave.  I just know Spencer, and how he treats me.  I know I want other people to treat me like he does and that I should want to treat other people that way."

Jon nodded; he might have been newer to Ryan's bubble, but he understood this well enough.

Ryan swallowed and continued.  "Brendon treats me like that.  And now there's you, so that's three of you.  I don't feel like a freak, or a novelty, not when I'm with you.  My thoughts - my reactions - you respond like they make sense, not like I'm crazy.  I didn't fit in there and I never quite fit in here either but I fit with Spencer and I fit with Brendon and with you."  He shrugged.  "It's hard for me to separate that, I guess.  It's hard not to want to be greedy."

Jon honestly didn't think of himself for a minute when he responded, "It's not greedy when it's what you need."

Ryan sighed and lay his head carefully on Jon's chest, but didn't answer.

• 
  

The next day Jon told Brendon, and together they went to talk to Spencer.  Before Jon had stammered out half an explanation though, Spencer was smiling and motioning for them to calm down.  His eyes were full of calm understanding.

"Hey, it's okay.  We already talked about it," he shrugged.  "He asked, you know?  I already knew it but I was waiting for him to ask."

Brendon opened his mouth but no sound came out.  Jon did the same with no more success.

Spencer's smile softened.  "Let's just say I'm fairly sympathetic to the whole not-being-able-to-help-falling-in-love-with-Ryan-Ross thing.  And I'm pretty in favor of giving him what he needs.  Just because he needs you two doesn't mean he doesn't also need me. It's really all okay with me."  Most shocking of all, Spencer really sounded like he meant it.

Brendon was too stunned to respond but Jon gave it a shot, "Okay but - that's... Spencer that's a lot but you should, if we're going to do this and actually try and make it work you should know that--"

"We love you too!"  Brendon blurted, his hands flying over his mouth immediately after.

Now it was Spencer's turn to stare, stunned and open-mouthed.

"Why?"  He eventually demanded, sounding indignant yet faint.

"Why?"  Brendon repeated, completely confused by the question.

"Because you're Spencer," Jon found the courage to say, firm yet gentle.

Brendon nodded spastically, "But if you don't - obviously if you don't want us we'd never--"

"No!"  Spencer all but shouted, still looking stunned but certain, at least, of that.  He put two fingers to his bottom lip, his eyes widening.  He shook his head slowly.  "No.  No that's not it.  I just... I never expected, I didn't see.  I just saw how you both looked at Ryan - how he looked at you."

"We've been looking at you the same way Spence," Brendon assured him, finding his own bravery.  He smiled slightly.  "You were the one who made me look first, actually."  He ducked his head, an apology in case one was needed.

Judging by Spencer's sudden, surprised beam, Jon was guessing it wasn't.

"At me?"  he asked helplessly.

Brendon nodded seriously.  "For a long time you were all I could see.  But you loved him so much... I couldn't help loving him too.  And then Jon..." Brendon shrugged.

Spencer nodded back, "I get it," he said, like he did, looking at Jon with easy love in his eyes.

Jon was getting used to seeing that in Brendon's eyes, coming to know the way it sped up his heart, but seeing it in Spencer's was new again, and he had to will himself to breathe.

"So do you think...?"  Brendon began hopefully.

Spencer finished for him without pause, "We should go get Ryan."

They found him half asleep in Spencer's bunk and they woke him up together, saying his name with gentle persistence.  His eyes flew open and fixed on Spencer, his face lighting up even before any of them had a chance to speak.

"Spence - really?"

Spencer smiled, unsurprised that Ryan was already on the right page.

"Yes, really."

Ryan acted immediately, jumping up and pulling all of them into the bunk with him with the help of his impossibly long arms.  They fell in a heap on top of him, but he just laughed triumphantly and grinned up at them.  There shouldn't have been room for all of them but somehow there was.  Spencer eyed Ryan, playfully suspicious, but Ryan only smiled back innocently.

"Look how we all fit together, Spence!"  he enthused rather gleefully.

Spencer rolled his eyes, but his voice was filled with love and contentment when he answered, "Just like magic."