So, um, I've been reading rather a lot of cleolinda lately --- particularly Movies in Fifteen Minutes, True Blood recaps, chapter-by-chapter commentaries on the Twilight books; not so much her actual journal entries --- and, uh, this episode was begging to be mocked even more than every episode of Charmed in the history of ever and, see, it's been way too long since I've written anything other than a list or a first sentence or an O HAI THIS WAS MY DAY entry and, well, I have a lot of time off this week and I haven't confirmed any plans with ACBTP yet, so . . . wait, what's my point again?

Oh, right. This was pretty much inevitable.




LAST EPISODE: Elle was established as actually dead in the teaser (and, yet, Kristen Bell was still credited as a "Special Guest Star"); Claire and Hiro played Hot Potato with THE CATALYST in the past; we got to meet Hiro's mommy and find out exactly how she died; Arthur Petrelli followed Claire and Hiro into the past, where neither of them did a blessed thing to, you know, stop him, so he stole Hiro's powers, as well as THE CATALYST, threw Hiro off the roof (don't worry, he grabbed on to a flagpole), and sent Claire back to the present-day Company. Also, Sylar finally confirmed that Arthur Petrelli is not his real father and, gee, I so totally didn't even begin to see that coming!, but only because he had earlier eaten the brain of a red shirt whose special power was a tingle on the back of her neck whenever anyone lied to her (and then he had some cake). Also again, there was some stuff about Peter and Nathan and woe and a bullet and . . . look, I don't really know, but some stuff happened, alright? If you want to find out, I guess you could always pay attention to the "Previously On" montage.

SYLAR (voice-over): Blah blah blah, philosophical rambling, on the sixth day, blah blah blah, here is a Montage of Significant Events to distract you, blah blah blah, ULTIMATE COSMIC JOKE!

Pinehearst
PETER: *holds gun, has a scar on his face*

ARTHUR PETRELLI: *is dead because he was killed*

NATHAN: Hey, as your Older Brother, it is within my Official Capacity to interrupt this moment of pondering you're sitting here having.

PETER: Aren't you just supposed to act like a general jackass?

NATHAN: That too.

PETER: ZOMG THE FORMULA IS EBIL!

NATHAN: YOU ONLY THINK SO 'COS YOU ARE THE YOUNGER BROTHER YOU'RE SO BLIND ZOMG!

TREES: *silently go about their business of converting carbon dioxide into oxygen*

NATHAN: Pete . . .

PETER: *cannot resist his Older Brother's Tiny Voice; hands over gun*

NATHAN: *feels smug and self-satis---*

PETER: *punches him in the face*

ARTHUR PETRELLI: Hey, doesn't anybody care that I just got killed and killed and killed until I was dead?

RYAN: Nobody but Sylar, really.

Primatech
Y'know, maybe I'm just dense, but somehow, I can never quite remember the difference between Pinehearst and Primatech. Only one of them is a fake paper company, right? But they're both branches of the Company, right? And one of them is based in Texas or something, right? Right? Aaagh, this would be so much easier if they didn't both start with the letter "P," just sayin'.

NOAH: ZOMG WE MUST HAVE GUNS!

MEREDITH: How convenient that you keep a fully stocked rack in the broom closet.

CLAIRE: I know, right? It's like, who needs Pine-Sol? The Primatech boys can just shoot germs out of the carpet.

MEREDITH: Wait, what? This floor is all concrete!

CLAIRE: Well, sure it is . . . now.

NOAH: Hey, let's try and pay attention to the plot!

SYLAR: *puts the place on lockdown*

ANGELA: Knowing what's going to happen means I never get any lines.

CLAIRE: Oh, hey, speaking of that, why didn't you see this coming?

ANGELA: Well, my power only works when I'm asleep, and even then I have to make it into a genuine REM cycle, and---

NOAH: I swear, if you bitches can't pay attention to the plot, I will turn this story right the fuck around and not make any pit stops until we get home!

SYLAR [over the intercom]: Angst, angst, woe, I know I repulse you ZOMG, woe, angst, I should really do something with my hair so that my outward countenance can convey the abyss of torment that is my innermost soul, woe, woe, ANGST.

I'm sorry, but seriously, Sylar is so effing emo here. I almost wonder what would happen if everyone just decided to stop paying attention to him right here and now. Okay, so obviously they're locked in and everything, but still. If only they had a card table and some chairs and a few decks, he'd most likely get bored after watching them play a few rounds of Hearts and, I don't know, slit his wrists EXCEPT OH WAIT HE WOULD JUST HEAL BECAUSE HE COPIED CLAIRE'S POWER EARLIER THIS SEASON OH GOD NO WONDER HE'S SO EMO HE CAN'T EVEN KILL HIMSELF WOE ANGST NO ONE UNDERSTANDS HIS PAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIN! WOE.

SYLAR [still on the intercom]: You see me as a monster, yet you did this to me. And before the night is over, I'm gonna prove to you, one by one, that you're all monsters. Exactly like me.

RYAN: *is not even making that up*

TITLE CARD

Still at Pinehearst--- I mean, Primatech, GODDAMMIT

NOAH: Don't worry, it's cool, there's only one place he could possibly be broadcasting from, and it isn't like we didn't just grab a bunch of guns from the broom closet.

ANGELA: Hey, about that, shouldn't we maybe have grabbed one for me?

NOAH: Psh, you'll see him coming, STFU.

ANGELA: HOW MANY TIMES DO I HAVE TO EXPLAIN THIS? I CAN ONLY SEE THE FUTURE IN MY DREAMS!

NOAH: O RLY? Might wanna grab a blanket and take a bit of a nap right now, then.

MEREDITH: *is holding a flashlight even though she can totally make fire in her hands*

SYLAR: If it weren't for this intercom, I'd just show up and kill you all right away, you know. Except then there'd be no one for me to tell about my paaaaaaaaaaaain.

CLAIRE: *reminds everyone about Sylar's only weak point*

SYLAR: Hey, I just decided that I really hate Claire for . . . I dunno, some reason or other.

CLAIRE: SHUT UP YOU SICK BASTARD! (Maybe, if I use enough bad words, and shoot him enough glares, they will finally let me age a little bit.)

MEREDITH: *is wielding a gun even though she can totally set people on fire from across the room*

NOAH: My God, this door is shoddy! It just caves right in when I kick it, and I don't even have any abilities!

SECURITY RENT-A-COP: *is dead*

SYLAR: You're not hunting me, Noah. I'm hunting you.

RYAN: *is still not making that up*

Deveaux Rooftop, Sixteen Years Ago
HIRO: *hangs on to flagpole for dear life; bemoans his current predicament to a pigeon*

PIGEON: *is unmoved by his plight*

Mohinder's Lab
SUBTITLES: *remind us that this is Present Day, because we're not smart enough to remember that Hiro is currently the only character stuck in the past*

ANDO, DAPHNE, and MATT: *could not agree on what to do about Hiro being stuck in the past if his life depended on it . . . which it kind of does, guys*

ANDO: I must take the formula! I must become a time traveler! I must save Hiro! Hiro is my soulmate, but not in a gay way or anything!

DAPHNE: *runs to Mohinder's other lab . . . really, really fast*

Mohinder's Lab at Primatech . . . Or Maybe Pinehearst
MOHINDER: ZOMG I'M DYING . . . but I should still have ample time to record my procedure into the handy-dandy recorder that I never go anywhere without. You know, for science. Because I am "the scientist" on this show. And also "the pretty one."

PETER: ZOMG THE FORMULA IS EBIL!

MOHINDER: NO IT WILL SAVE MY LIFE!

PETER: *still has the gun*

MOHINDER: ZOMG I'M STILL DYING . . . but, hey, I might as well go ahead and try to convince you that I'm right. I mean, we are friends, after all. Mostly. Well, practically. You're practically my best friend in the world, really.

UNEXPECTED DAPHNE: *is unexpected*

MOHINDER: ZOMG WHAT YOU DID DO?!

Fighting ensues.

FLINT: *does not have a gun, because he can totally make fire in his hands*

THAT ONE GUY WHO CAN SMELL FEAR OR WHATEVER: *knocks over a cart*

MOHINDER: ZOMG YOUR OLDER BROTHER!

PETER: Nathan's not in charge anymore.

RYAN: *giggles*

Arthur Petrelli's Office
THAT ONE MARINE GUY WHO'S PLAYED BY DEAN FROM SAVED!: *finds Nathan*

NATHAN: ZOMG THIS IS ALL PETER'S FAULT!

MARINE GUY: *gets his neck snapped by that guy who smells fear or whatever*

RYAN: OH GOSH, SHOW, THANK YOU VERY MUCH FOR THAT PLEASANT FLASHBACK!

THAT ONE GUY WHO SMELLS FEAR OR WHATEVER: You will lose because your Younger Brother is one of the good guys now, so there.

Mohinder's Lab
Daphne's back, with one dose of the formula. Matt expresses concern about what will happen if Ando takes the formula --- rather than gain powers that are anything like Hiro's, he could "glow in the dark" or "grow a second head" --- fair point, Matt --- but Daphne and Ando are all STFU AND HAVE FAITH, GODDAMMIT!

Ando injects himself, and his arm is nice to look at.

Ando faints.

Heh.

Sixteen Years Ago
HIRO: *climbs off the flagpole and back onto the rooftop; is adorable about it*

Hiro talks to kid!Hiro and convinces him to help steal the formula.

Primatech . . . Probably
THE PHONE: *is dead*

ANGELA: That doesn't surprise you, does it? He's put us all on lockdown.

CLAIRE: Yeah, I was there. Maybe I can open this window.

She fails.

ANGELA: *doesn't say it in so many words, but totally gets the whole SYLAR = EMO McWHINEY PANTS thing*

THE PHONE: BRRING! BRRING!

CLAIRE (who, by the way, is still totally holding a gun, even though the only other person in the room with her is her biological grandmother and she knows better than anyone that bullets aren't gonna do all that much to stop Sylar, I'm just saying): Hey, this phone has a loudspeaker!

SYLAR: *walks over another dead body, explains to Claire that he will let her, Noah, and Meredith go if she shoots Angela until she is dead*

SYLAR: ZOMG ANGELA PETRELLI IS A HOOR; SHE WANTED TO BLOW UP NEW YORK CITY, SHE TRIED TO KILL HER MAN-HUBBY, AND --- MOST IMPORTANTLY, LEST WE FORGET --- SHE TOTALLY LIED TO ME ABOUT BEING MY MOTHER! SHE IS NOT REALLY MY MOTHER! WOE.

CLAIRE: ZOMG WHY ARE YOU DOING THIS?!

SYLAR: ZOMG EVERYTHING IS YOUR DADDY'S FAULT! ZOMG ZOMG ZOMG!

CLAIRE: *looks at Angela and cocks her gun; almost appears to consider it for a second*

ANGELA: Lookit how big my eyes go and, also, I didn't see this coming!

CLAIRE: *shoots the phone*

RYAN: OH MY GOD, SERIOUSLY, YOU PEOPLE MAKE DRACO MALFOY SEEM WELL-ADJUSTED, GEEZ!

Level Five
NOAH: *frees inmates*

MEREDITH: Are you on crack?! These skanks wanna kill us badder'n Sylar!

ERIC WOSSNAME: Hello, lovely. It's so funny that you're here, I was totally having a dream about you just now. It was awwwwwfully dirty. But then, you're kinda dirty too, aren't you?

MEREDITH: Whoever wrote this episode has never gotten laid, I swear . . .

NOAH: *cocks gun*

MEREDITH: . . . which might possibly have something to do with the fact that he is so deep in the closet that a pile of Christmas presents is about to fall on top of his fool head.

RYAN: Hmm, yeah, that would mostly explain the gun fixation.

MEREDITH: THAT is my POINT.

NOAH: Whoever brings me the head of John the Baptist Sylar on a silver platter earns his freedom.

ERIC: Uh, we can totally escape, you know.

NOAH: Au contraire, Sylar's in here with us.

ERIC: OH GOD NO HE COULD FORCE US TO LISTEN TO SOME OF HIS POETRY!

MEREDITH: All hope is lost, isn't it?

NOAH: Naw, these suckers are just bait. I got it. It's cool.

Mohinder's Other Lab
PETER: PETER SMASH!

MOHINDER: ZOMG FLAMMABLE!

FLINT: Who gives a fuck? Fire pretty, and it's not like I can git burneded.

MOHINDER: WHAT ABOUT PETER?

FLINT: *doesn't give a rat's aspirin about Peter*

PETER: *knows it*

MOHINDER: LOOK AT WHAT YOU'VE BEEN REDUCED TO, PETER!

FLINT: You talk too much! I oughta knee you in the stomach and then throw you across the room!

MOHINDER: What's that, some sort of inscrutable Southern colloquialism?

FLINT: Actually, no.

PETER: I'm not sure that was called for.

FLINT: Hey, you're the one what made smashin' stuff look so fun.

Mohinder's Lab
DAPHNE: *throws water on Ando*

ANDO: I was having a dream! And you were there, and you were there, and . . . a talking lion?

DAPHNE: Congrats, you have the ability to pass out like nobody's bidness.

ANDO: *oh em jeezus he looks sexy wet*

MATT: ZOMG TIME TRAVEL ALREADY!

ANDO: I am the master of time and space. I . . . am the master . . . of time and space. I am the master---

DAPHNE: Hiro does it different!

MATT: SRSLY, we're both totally qualified to give you advice, even though a) we've never time traveled in our lives and b) we're still not sure if that's the ability that the formula gave you and c) we're still not sure if the formula worked at all, frankly.

DAPHNE: Right, so scrunch your eyes. That's bound to work.

It doesn't.

ANDO: *punches a table in frustration*

ANDO'S ARM: *goes all pink and shiny and crackly with energy electricity*

MATT and DAPHNE: ZOMG SHINY!

There can be little to no doubt that a threesome ensues at this point, but --- alas! --- we cut back to our "A" story before it gets going.

Somewhere at Primatech
MEREDITH: *is still carrying a flashlight in one hand and a gun in the other, zomg*

THAT ONE INMATE'S HAND: *is metal and shiny and . . . severed, but still wriggling?*

Meredith approaches a supply closet that appears to have exploded. A tiny bottle of some clear liquid that is most likely not water rolls ominously toward her. She puts her gun down to look at it and sees that it is adrenaline. Right at that moment, UNANNOUNCED SYLAR IS UNANNOUNCED.

MEREDITH: *grabs her gun*

SYLAR: Your pathetic gun is no match for my mighty TK!

ERIC: No, your pathetic TK --- hi, Meredith! I wrote a song about your hair! --- is no match for my mighty . . . um, what is my power, anyway? Instant voodoo?

Y'know, it seems to me that Eric actually could win here. Sure, Sylar is telekinetic and he eats brains and everything, but Eric controls people's bodies. Sylar's brain is a part of his body. Eric could fairly easily just cause Sylar's brain to, I dunno, melt and ooze out of his ears or something, couldn't he?

Apparently, no he couldn't.

SYLAR: *kills Eric with his brain*

ERIC: ZOMG MEREDITH I WILL ALWAYS LOVE YOU UNTIL THE DAY AFTER FOREVER!

MEREDITH: Oh me, oh my, it really is too bad I can't set you on fire from all the way over here; I better run for my gun!

SYLAR: *injects her with adrenaline, which is . . . bad, I guess*

Level Five
THE ONLY INMATE FROM THE SCENE WHERE NOAH FREED THEM ALL WHO HASN'T GOTTEN KILLED YET: *has apparently gotten killed*

NOAH: *notices*

MEREDITH: *can't control her fire*

NOAH: Hey, don't worry; the adrenaline will wear off eventually, and hey, it's not like you're really doing anything destructive in the meantime. I mean, you could be burning yourself to a crisp from the inside out, but no, you're just involuntarily releasing small spurts from your hands about once a minute. Things could really be worse.

RYAN: OH WAIT, HE DOESN'T ACTUALLY SAY THAT, DOES HE? SILLY, SILLY ME!

SYLAR: *locks them in the cell together; picks up Noah's gun*

NOAH: *grabs Meredith's gun*

SYLAR: This glass is bulletproof, fool!

NOAH: WOE IS ME ZOMG.

SYLAR: See?! Tolja y'all were all just like me! WHAT NOW, BITCH?!

Arthur Petrelli's Nathan Petrelli's Office
Hey, um, has anyone done anything with the body, or is it still just lying there on the floor? I'm just, you know, wondering.

NATHAN: *plays with his shiny swirly paperweight ball of ebil zomg*

THAT ONE GUY WHO SMELLS FEAR OR WHATEVER: *paces menacingly*

NATHAN: Everybody loves Peter except me I hate that sanctimonious little bastard, but he will lose this time because losing is what he does. I, however, remain unaffected by the general goings-on at this time; my shiny swirly paperweight is much more interesting than your menacing pacing, FYI.

THAT ONE GUY WHO SMELLS FEAR OR WHATEVER: OH WHATEVER HE IS WINNING RIGHT NOW!

NATHAN: Define "winning."

THAT ONE GUY WHO SMELLS FEAR OR WHATEVER: PETER SMAAAAAAAAAAAASH!

NATHAN: *smashes him with his shiny swirly ball of ebil*

THAT ONE GUY WHO SMELLS FEAR OR WHATEVER: *dies an icy bloody death zomg*

TRACY: I'm so hot I killed him, tee-hee!

Mohinder's Loft
BOTH OF ANDO'S HANDS: *are all shiny and sparkly and crackly with energy electricity*

Okay, so the nub and thrust of this scene is that Ando's ability is to SUPERCHARGE other people's abilities. They figure, if he continually bitch-slaps Daphne, maybe she'll be able to run fast enough that she'll go back in time sixteen years.

Er, wait, we haven't actually quite got that far yet; I'm getting ahead of myself.

NOAH: PAY some GODDAMN ATTENTION to the GODDAMN PLOT, I swear to GODDAMN GOD!

RYAN: Uh, that's actually sort of what I'm trying to do here. Is it my fault the "plot" takes a lot longer the second time around?

NOAH: *bitch-slaps him*

RYAN: "I curse the day you were born!"

Anyway.

Primahearst
MEREDITH: *still can't control her fire*

SYLAR: *feels superior to everyone in the general vicinity*

CLAIRE: *is concerned for everyone's well-being*

ANGELA: He's trying to manipulate us, dear. Forcing our hands makes him feel powerful. It is, in fact, the only thing that truly makes him feel powerful anymore. If we do what he wants, we're doing exactly what he wants us to do.

CLAIRE: STFU I HAVE A GUN!

They walk out of the office and into the hallway hand-in-hand. Angela still hasn't had time to take a nap, so she doesn't JUST KNOW exactly where Sylar will be waiting for them, oh well.

UNANNOUNCED SYLAR: *oh god where's Angela; knocks Claire's gun out of her hands in about half a second, grabs her by the neck and shoves her up against the wall, because Claire Bennett can totally be choked to death*

CLAIRE: Where's Angela?

SYLAR: Well, you waited before, so . . . I had to up the stakes. Save Daddy, or is it Granny?

CLAIRE: Let me go!

I would just like to point out that, like every other person Sylar has ever held in this position, it does not seem to occur to Claire that she can totally, you know, kick him. Which makes sense, I guess. I mean, SYLAR is the VILLAIN and CLAIRE is the HERO here; VIOLENCE is in SYLAR'S nature, not CLAIRE'S. The only thing in this type of situation that's in CLAIRE'S nature is REASONING HER WAY OUT OF THIS.

Or, really, not so much REASONING as, you know, just generally LETTING HIM SAY WHAT HE'S GOTTA SAY until he lets her go, zomg.

CLAIRE: *scuttles away and runs like hell*

SYLAR: *stares after her*

Level Five
MEREDITH: *still can't control her fire*

NOAH: *is all sweaty*

CLAIRE: ZOMG DAD!

NOAH: Claire-Bear! 'S okay, I know the magic numbers that will open the door; now that you're here, we're saved! Gosh, it's a good thing your mother insisted on teaching you how to count.

CLAIRE: Sylar tore the frakking keypad off!

MEREDITH: *still can't control her fire*

NOAH: Right, I got this. Meredith, I know you CAN'T CONTROL YOUR FIRE right now, but I need you to hold as much heat in your hands as you can stand and then touch the glass.

MEREDITH: *does this*

NOAH: *instructs everyone to back away, shoots glass*

GLASS: *barely feels it*

MEREDITH: ALL IS LOST I CAN'T CONTROL MY FIRE!

CLAIRE: Psh. *jumps through glass*

GLASS: *makes a pretty cool sound as it breaks*

MEREDITH: *still can't control her fire*

CLAIRE: *has a really huge shard of glass stuck in her back, takes it out and looks at it significantly*

MEREDITH: *can't escape because she can't control her fire, but encourages the other two to stop Sylar*

CLAIRE: I WILL BE BACK FOR YOU WHETHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT, BITCH!

Nathan's Office
NATHAN and TRACY: *have a disagreement that ends with him firing her, it's not exactly edge-of-your seat dialogue, but it tries hard*

Mohinder's Loft

Oh, HERE's the scene where they come up with the "bitch-slapping = time travel!" theory.

MATT: But, but, but, what if, what if, what if? *mimblewimble he loves Daphne sooo much alas alack*

DAPHNE: *is confidence personified*

ANDO and DAPHNE: *time travel zomg*

Sixteen Years Ago
Hiro and kid!Hiro open his father's safe and steal the formula. UNANNOUNCED KAITO IS UNANNOUNCED, but then, it is his study.

HIRO (in Japanese): Your son and I were just -- playing.

HOLY CRAP DOES THAT SOUND WRONG! (What? It DOES!)

Kid!Hiro: *dashes off to bed*

KAITO: *notices the safe, which they totally left open*

Fighty time! Kaito picks up a nearby sword; they move into the kitchen, where Hiro grabs . . . a really big piece of French bread. (Hand to God, I am completely serious.)

HIRO: *starts to explain that ZOMG THE FORMULA IS EBIL*

DAPHNE and ANDO: *grab Hiro faster than the eye can see*

Mohinder's Loft
MATT and DAPHNE: *embrace*

ANDO and HIRO: *embrace, then bicker like an old married couple --- for a few seconds, but still --- about the fact that Hiro was about to destroy the formula, and couldn't they have rescued him a few minutes later?*

HIRO: ZOMG THE FORMULA IS EBIL!

DAPHNE: Hey, I can do something about that.

HIRO: *is the noblest character on this show, even without being the master of time and space*

Nathan's Office
TRACY: *finds the EBIL FORMULA ZOMG*

HIRO: Stop! We have come for the formula!

DAPHNE: It doesn't belong to you!

TRACY: And you are . . . ?

HIRO: Hiro Nakamura! It is my sacred duty to see that it is destroyed!

TRACY: Sorry, I've got plans for this little piece of paper, Pikachu. *starts to walk around them*

HIRO: PIKACHU?!

HIRO: *turns around*

HIRO: *nods respectfully*

HIRO: Excuse me.

HIRO: *punches her in the face and knocks her flat on her ass*

DAPHNE: Time to go. *superspeeds them out of there*

TRACY: *wonders what the fuck just happened*

RYAN: *has not made up one word since this scene started*

NOTHING IN THE HISTORY OF THE SHOW: *will ever be funnier than this*

Mohinder's Lab
More smashing going on. But that's nothing new at this point, and the episode is starting to wind up, so maybe something else should happen right about now.

THE EBIL FORMULA: *splashes Mohinder in the face and revives him*

MOHINDER: *fails to notice that he's just been cured*

PETER: So, job well done then. We better evacuate everybody before we burn the place down, though. My Older Brother is still in here.

FLINT: Ask me if I care, bitch.

UNANNOUNCED NATHAN: *knocks Flint out with a pipe*

PETER: So, you're the good guy now?

NATHAN: That's right. *punches him in the stomach*

FLINT: FLAME ON!

PETER: *injects himself with the ebil formula zomg, grabs Nathan and flies out of there just before the place explodes*

Gosh, what a surprising time to go to commercial.

Primatech
ANGELA: *is hostage*

SYLAR: *feels paaaaaaaaaaaaain*

ANGELA: I cared for you, I guided you---

SYLAR: YOU ARE NOT MY MOTHER!

Blah blah, talk talk, bored now. This goes on for a while.

UNANNOUNCED CLAIRE: *jams that really huge shard of glass into the back of Sylar's fleshy head*

ANGELA: Hey, I didn't see that coming!

CLAIRE: *rushes off to save Meredith, goddammit*

Level Five
MEREDITH: *still can't control her fire*

CLAIRE: I LUB YOU MOMMY!

MEREDITH'S FIRE: *burns and consumes*

Some Forest
NATHAN: HOW DARE YOU SAVE MY LIFE, LITTLE BROTHER! *flies off in high dudgeon*

Montage of Significant Events
Mohinder (who is, naturally, providing a voice-over at this point) notices his reflection in a car window, and ZOMG HE'S PRETTY AGAIN; Hiro and Daphne are victorious; Claire, Noah, and Angela watch the fire; Tracy is driving the car, and invites Mohinder to get in; Hiro rips up the ebil formula zomg; that guru guy who got beheaded by Arthur Petrelli a few episodes ago is alive and well in Mohinder's loft; Primatech burns; and oh hey, that is Claire's eye.

THE END OF VOLUME THREE

VOLUME FOUR, "FUGITIVES"

THREE WEEKS LATER
WASHINGTON, D.C.
Yeah, there's this overlong scene where Nathan blabs to the President about PEOPLE WITH ABILITIES ZOMG and convinces him that the best course of action is to lock them all up. Because, you know, he's just that much of a hypocrite lately.

End of Episode

Final Thoughts
Bored now.

No, seriously, I've pretty much had it with this show. Not even Kristen Bell could do very much to hold my interest any lon--- OH WAIT.