I argue with myself.  Constantly.  I just make up shit to argue about and imagine myself inside, well, my like, two selves.

The me-one, and the one who talks with a weird British accent for no apparent reason.
I interview myself in the shower.  ("So, what's your relationship like with your father?  Interesting.  And what made you want to hike the entire Appalachian trail?  You lived for a few years in Mexico, how EXCITING, tell us about it.")
Or if I'm bored at work I imagine I'm on the Oprah show.
Or something, whatever.  Point is I think I'm totally insane.  And really, really self absorbed. 
I AM totally insane.

The very few times I've ever been actually 100% relaxed with a person, I've gone batshit insane and made no sense.
That's another thing, I never relax.  Ever.  I'm always completely wound up about how my shirt looks or what I'm saying or what stupid thing I'm going to do next.
I dunno.

Steph this isn't going to sound like a peptalk and it isn't but I STILL feel alone here.  I am.  It's true.
And when/if it ends with Os...for whatever reason...I'll be entirely, utterly alone.  I know how pathetic that sounds.   Just....Evelyn is great but we have nothing in common, Connie is pregnant and getting married and blech, Fabian is just Fabian...... and those are the 3 people I am/was closest with here.

But it's okay.  The point is, you're not crazy.  (and neither are you.  I'm sorry for ignoring your LJ posts.)  And you're not alone.  You know why?  You have made a bazillion new friends, and I bet that if you asked them, they would tell you that they feel loco a vezes tambien.

I can't remember where i was going with this.

You're not alone though.  You know why?  Because I am always and always going to be only a phone call/IM/lj post away, okay?
PS: I read your book again, 13 little blue envelopes (I accidentaly stole it....) and thought about you the entiiire time  i was reading it.