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My mother :: “.......I SMELL GAS*. DDDDDD: ........*OPENS OVEN DOOR AND PROMPTLY SHOVES HER HEAD RIGHT INSIDE IT TO START SNIFFING*” />
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Oh dear.

But tis a pity, really – the woman is obviously trying so hard to win herself a Darwin Award, and yet she shot her own chances for one in the foot years ago by having me.



*Also, please note that she claims to “smell gas” once every few days, out of nowhere, apparently just to have something else to throw a dramatic fit over. Much like her habit of claiming to have strokes because her legs hurt!