I am by no means a fashion expert or anything, nor do I claim to know what generally looks good on people, but I just kinda get this feeling that some people just DON'T suit their clothes. Case in point: I met this girl yeah, and she doesn't look bad, or unpretty or anything. But she dresses like a complete tart– short ass skirts, flashy jackets and all that. See the thing is, A. she really doesn't have to cause I reckon she's physically capable of looking really good without wanting to dress like a hooker, and B. IT LOOKS REALLY BAD ON HER. It just...doesn't suit. I can't even make myself describe this. I can't even say "hey, imagine a moderately-sized blonde girl who's like 4'11 dressed in a tight ass tshirt and short denim mini" and make you guys think that it doesn't work for her but uhm...point is, people put a lot of effort into dressing up don't they? And mind you, I have nothing much against women who dress sexually but for most part it just annoys me, especially when all you're doing is say, being at uni or the library or something? I mean...I don't know what I mean. Sometimes I feel like people's intentions are purely to attract attention. Y'know, human nature, sex sex sex blah blah blah yadada. I guess I'm just a little frustrated that the whole appearance thing just matters SO much and I can't be anywhere (especially at this age) where I don't feel like I'm just majorly underdressed and feeling that tiny bit of guilt deep down inside because of it.

Maybe it's just me, because I'm that person who wakes up everyday and put on pretty much the first things I see (sure I do clean myself up better and accessorize because I like cool things but that's just in addition to the crap I'm seen in every day). And it's all slobby but I'm too lazy to care and blah (see why I don't have a job?). It's just that when people DO dress up to go to town, etc, I'm there in a Tshirt and a suit jacket just so that I don't look too informal (also they sometimes don't let you into bars when you wear hoodies), I wear nothing but jeans most of the time, and half the time when I'm out, I'm at uni anyway...I'd be sitting in boring ass lectures and writing essays and drinking coffee/beer and attempting to learn things! Why does one need to 'dress up' for that! Man, if I drove to uni (instead of walk or bus, walking means no jandals, because they put holes between my toes, and busing means I should look reasonably normal cause I don't really like stares), I would totally be that person who goes to classes in my PJs and a robe over it or something. I'd be the biggest slacker in the universe! I don't know if I'm only speaking for myself when I describe situations such as times where I have to be at the library for a measley half hour THE MOST because I'm returning a book or something, but because I'm getting out of the house for that pathetic ten/twenty/thirty minutes, I'd have to put on shoes AND socks, and I dunno, not pajama pants or something. It's too much effort, really. It also makes me wonder if I'd care so much if I were not female. Society really has this screwed-up strange ways of seeing things, no?

I'm sure we're used to the arguments here. Appearance matters. Which basically means I lose. I haven't shaved my armpits, legs or anything since April, I couldn't be bothered going for a haircut right now because it just means I'd have to get another one in six months and go through this awful cycle all over again (and I hate hairdressers, really), I don't ever dress up, I own three pairs of shoes–two sneakers and a formal pair which are basically black lace-ups, a pair of boots that hurt like hell so that's basically a costume, I don't use makeup, I like eating too much to care about my weight, and my skin is greasy and acne problem here. Don't even get me started on the eyebrows and stuff like that. Oh, and the only time I ever wear skirts are when I should (weddings, etc when I'm not in the wedding band) or over jeans. I don't own a handbag, so I walk into job interviews with stuff in my jacket pockets, because handbags are just not me, I'd feel like a right wuss hanging on to one.
Sometimes I feel like a greasy dirty hippie (who eats meat). But despite all that, I seem to be pretty satisfied with myself. Which is a good thing, really. I just need a job and things (and definitely will need a REAL job eventually, and especially with me doing a media-related degree and all...) and I just don't want to feel like I should compromise my ways.