I've held off with this post for awhile because the emotions were still pretty raw and my feelings about it weren't entirely organized. I'm in a much more philosophical frame of mind now and feel I can do the story the objective justice it deserves.

Around May, my girlfriend's mother became extremely sick. So sick, in fact, that my girlfriend was forced to fly back to Australia to be with her. It's since become clear that, while her mother will make a full recovery eventually, the road to recovery is going to be long and arduous. My girlfriend's family needed her, and she didn't hesitate to tear up her roots here to move home and do what needed to be done. Her willingness and ability to make such a huge sacrifice on behalf of her family has only confirms what an amazing woman she is. Of course, it also put some strain on our relationship.

Prior to her mom getting sick, my girlfriend and I had been talking about moving in together. I was also making more concrete plans around us. With her relocation back to Australia, all of that had to change. Her emotional focus needed to be on her family and her mom's recovery. While I was certainly willing to entertain the idea of relocating myself to Australia as well, it wasn't something as simple and packing a couple of bags and buying a ticket. It became clear that we would have some protracted time apart. During that time, we fell out of connection with each other. Long distance is hard enough, especially when being on almost exactly opposite time zones, but the addition of the emotional trauma and shock inflicted by her mom's illness, has taken the spark out of the woman I've been in love with. Both seeing what was happening, we put our relationship on hold, broke up and agreed to stay in touch and stay friends.

While seemingly a contrary move, this was the best decision at the time for us both, but it wasn't easy. I think its clear from my previous posts the depths of the feelings I have for this woman. I made the decision because I know that she needs to focus her emotional attention on her family and on re-building her life and career back in Sydney. The last thing she needs is to contend with trying to maintain a relationship across the world. I know that if there is to be a chance for her and I later, that ending things when we did was the right choice. She can work on the things she needs to do, and I can do what I need as well. If its meant to be, we'll find a way.

In the meantime, I've been spending a lot of time dusting off my game, reviewing some of my study material and going out. While I'm not doing any serious hunting, just going out and running game has helped improve my attitude about where things stand for me. I've also come to the conclusion that, while guys like Mystery can be very successful with women on the initial meeting, eventually the cracks in their facade show through and the women lose interest. They are giving the appearance of substance, without the actuality of it. It's a stage performance, a very effective one. While I have a deep respect for their craft, I know that for myself, its much more important to me to have actual substance. For that reason, I intend to be spending a lot of time working through the David DeAngelo Inner Game and Mastery material. I'm also doing some other self-improvement things just for myself. I'm happy and content right now, taking every thing one day at a time.