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Tags: fanfic: in progress tv: the x-files actors: david duchovny rl: matt bouts of crazy lj: friends picspam
Published : 6 months, 3 weeks ago (Mon, 28 Apr 2008 08:57:35 PDT)
Searched: fanfic: in progress
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How do I get myself into these situations?
Last night, I rewatched the -- in my opinion highly underrated -- X-Files episode Mind's Eye (5x16). Well, God knows how many times I've seen it by now, but that's where Matt, Mike and co. and I are up to in our watching the series. The best XF episodes will always get me thinking, and this one is no exception. This time, though, it really got under my skin.
I drove home from Matt's early this morning, some Sufjan on the stereo (damn you, Kristen!), the characters and their interactions and idiosyncrasies swirling around in my mind. By the time I got home, let myself in, and powered up the laptop, a fanfic plot bunny of all things had taken up residence in my head.
Fuck you, fanfic muse. FUCK YOU. I don't have time for this shit.
I could blame the depth of my thoughts and the amount of time I spent chasing these ideas around in my head on ![[info]](http://p-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif) emily_shore if I wanted to be lame and inaccurate about it (thanks to her as-usual-great meta discussion going on, The X-Files, the Other, and the Mutant Enemy)... but Marty Glenn is never presented as a "genetic mutant," so that's a long stretch at best. Maybe it's just got my head in a much more contemplative place than usual? Damned if I know. Anyway.
I've always loved Mind's Eye, as I said. Marty Glenn as a character fascinates me, Lili Taylor is a fantastic guest actress (and actress all around), her chemistry with David is really something, and the X-file itself really intrigues me. You can draw rather striking parallels between this episode and S3's Oubliette; young woman accused of murder that it seems unlikely she was capable of committing, evidence continues to pile up against her, but throughout the investigation Mulder remains convinced of her innocence. However, beyond that, they're different enough that while I love them both, I consider them to be definitely separate.
Marty is no Lucy. While the focus in Mind's Eye is all about control, Oubliette is more centered around the cycle of victimhood, and how it not only effects victims of crime, but those around them. While both Lucy and Marty appear to be prisoners (literally or figuratively, depending on which episode you're looking at) of their lots in life and the "conditions" they suffer from, Lucy is all about escape, whereas Marty is all about control. Consequently, the manner in which Mulder relates to each woman differs in an important way; he sympathizes with Lucy, as a fellow victim of forces and events outside of his own control, yet he admires Marty and the ways in which she bends the world around her and hones her senses so that she remains as much in control of herself, her life, her actions and her circumstances, rather than her handicap.
"What is it, Marty? What do you see?"
Marty's handling of her blindness -- not only in how she acts upon the world, but in how she interacts with others -- is incredibly impressive, which of course fascinates Mulder. For a man who dejectedly describes himself as a pawn in a game he seems to believe, now more than ever, he can never win (to paraphrase Fight the Future a bit generously), this is not only interesting but lucrative, being something he must feel lacking in.
Marty is also a bit of a kindred spirit in several ways to Mulder. Her humor is much more biting and aggressive than his typically is, but the brand of sarcasm is nearly identical. He seems to sense the fear underlying her bravado and attitude, and attempts to work with that knowledge (first by antagonizing her to gauge her reaction -- something she can give back just as good as she gets -- then by pleading his case for her once he's formulated his basic theory about her motivations). He also recognizes an obvious comparison between her personality and that of the most significant female in his life, Scully, and even goes so far as to voice it (he doesn't verbally make the connection, but he looks very pointedly at Scully as he says:) "I think she just wants us to think she'’s strong and independent. It's important to her."
"I like you, Marty. I admire you. And I don't want to see you confess to crimes you didn't commit."
(Shallow Note: I had forgotten until I rewatched and capped this episode, but holy hell is it a gorgeous one. I mean, all XF episodes are visually stunning, but even within that, there are standouts. This one is definitely one of those.)
Marty doesn't want to show her cards to Mulder, constantly standing still as a brick wall for him to run up against as he tries to make a case for her innocence, but she lets a few things slip here and there. She holds her head in her hands and sighs, "I can't stop anything," when Mulder posits that she didn't commit the murders but tried to stop them somehow, arriving too late. The fact that she considers turning herself in for crimes she didn't commit, knowing (at least peripherally) that they will continue as long as the real culprit remains free, speaks to how helpless she feels by the time we reach the middle of the episode. Mulder obviously identifies personally with the feeling, and reaches out to attempt to drag her out of the hole she's digging for herself. She attempts to shake him off, but he's adamant; grabbing her by the arm as she leaves and making a serious promise: "You didn't do it. And I'm not going to let this happen. Do you hear me? Marty?"
"I can end this." "I'm sure that's what you've always wanted."
Though the first line is Marty's and the second is Mulder's, they can easily be switched in reference to another subject (Mulder's search for Samantha, among other possibilities). Mulder is finally able to make a strong enough case for Marty's innocence to have her released, and not only that, but to attempt to have her help them catch the real killer. Of course, this plan doesn't last long, as Mulder realizes not long after she's sent home that he's put control of her circumstance back into Marty's hands alone, and what she's going to do with it. Once again, I'd argue that his insight into her motives stems from his personal understanding of her struggle with that control, and how it appears to be, from several angles, a losing battle wrought with personal sacrifice.
And of course, that's how it ends. Marty sacrifices what little vision she had (though it wasn't her own) and her personal freedom for the sake of taking down the real killer, through his own eyes. It's twisted, but I love it for that. Her last words to the man who's essentially kept her a prisoner all her life: "I hate the way you see me." Once he's dead, she's sent back to prison on solid proof, and her world is finally shrouded in complete darkness. It's a sad, brave, lonely choice, but that makes it all the more something Mulder can understand. And in the end, even from her dark prison cell, Marty can offer a sliver of hope: "I'd never seen the ocean before. And now when I close my eyes, or even when I open them, that's all I see."
I swear, honestly, I didn't mean to get into meta on this episode, but it just came out of me. I suppose it's because I wanted to better understand why this episode remains an unsung hero favorite of mine from the series. That, and I need to examine anything I want to write about closely before I do so. Which brings me around to the initial motivation for this post: that stupid fanfic plot bunny.
I became inspired to write from Marty's point-of-view; about how she had honed all her other senses, and how she "saw" the world. How the mind's eye images that were intertwined with her own life affected her. And ultimately, how she came to interact with Mulder (c'mon, y'all knew it was going to come back around to him, didn't you? I'm only predictable as hell).
Why does this plot bunny annoy me? Oh, several reasons. (A) I like it, but I imagine hardly anyone would bother to read it. Ordinarily I'd say, "screw it, I'll write it anyway," but fanfic is a tricky beast. I don't have a craving or need for validation, but it's sort of a... "if a tree falls in the forest" type issue. If a fan pens a fic and no one cares to read it, what difference does it make? This issue wouldn't hold much credence if not for, (B) overall lack of time. Also, (C) there's the matter of the 29,000-word (and growing) XF fanfic I've been working on for months, which I really do want to finish one day, dammit.
I was actually hoping bardsmaid might be able to weigh in on this dilemma. You're not only used to writing for characters who are less often focused on than Mulder and Scully (namely Krycek and Marita). Still, they're recurring characters and central to the overall plot; this is a MotW character that 99% of the fandom likely doesn't give a rat's ass about. Is it worth it? Am I crazy? Feh, it's 8:50AM and I haven't gone to bed yet, I don't pretend to know.
"You were at the sentencing, Agent Mulder."
"Is it my cologne?"
"No, I just knew you'd be there."
I just... I really love the dynamic between Mulder and Marty. I thought it would be a unique and interesting way to explore the character I love most (Mulder) through the "eyes" of another who I like very much, too. SIGH. I reiterate: fuck you, fanfic muse.
Lastly, before I forget: NOTICE to poetrytoprose! elapses and I are very nearly done with our little project to get you hooked on The X-Files, and if all goes according to plan (which it seems it will), I'll be posting our collaborated efforts within the next couple of days. PREPARE YOURSELF. ;D
(Oh, and in case anyone missed them: ICONS and wallpapers of the new XF2 promo shot! :D) |
