Fireflies
Previously Titled: Your Smile
Pairings: YunJae, JaeChun, YooSu (Slight), Minsu (Squint)
Length: One-shot.
Previously Chaptered: One-shot. Complete.
Rating: PG-13
Author: kawaiineyo
Disclaimer: I do not own characters featured.
Synopsis: It was a moment of one night passion, but JaeJoong would remember his smile forever…


("Excuse me, but you wouldn't mind if I joined you?"

JaeJoong who had been reading a book by the window that looked out onto the busy streets of Seoul, paused in his reading and glanced up. A tall, handsome faced man was leaning over slightly, smiling a little nervously down at him. JaeJoong looked around himself, to make sure that the man was talking to him and then glanced back up, blushing, though there was really nothing to blush about.

"If you want too, I don't mind."

"Thank-you." The man nodded his head and sat down. A waitress came almost immediately and the man ordered a coffee. A few seconds of awkward silence passed between them, in which the man tapped his fingers on the table and JaeJoong pretended to read his novel. The man cleared his throat:

"My name is Jung YunHo," JaeJoong looked up, his fingers gripping the sides of his book.

"Kim JaeJoong... are you waiting for someone?"

"No. I actually come in here all the time to grab a coffee before heading back to class, I've never seen you in here before and you were sitting all alone, so I thought I'd come over and keep you company."

JaeJoong gazed over at the other man, a little uncertain and curious. He could spot a handful of people, male and female, seated by themselves.

"Do you normally keep the customers company, or is it just because I'm new?"

YunHo blushed. The waitress returned with his coffee.

"Well no, I'll admit. You're the first."

JaeJoong blinked, and felt his blush return.

"I'm new here," JaeJoong confided bookmarking his page, since it was nearly time for him to return to school. "I got bored with sitting in the library all the time during break and was recommended to this place, I like it better." JaeJoong stood. YunHo stood with him.

"I don't mean to be so forward, but I would like to see you again."

"I'll be here tomorrow," JaeJoong said with a small smile. He turned and left.)

JaeJoong stuffed his hands into the pockets of his jeans. He hadn't been to Cafe Seoul in nearly five years, but he thought now was the best time to return. It had been this place in which he had first met YunHo, and he had no idea that that first time encounter had been with his soul mate. JaeJoong thought that YunHo always wanting to be around him was because he was just being friendly--JaeJoong hadn't expected to fall for the other man so quickly, but he had. He thought he would spend the rest of his days loving YunHo from a distance and then YunHo had surprised him one chilly night with a kiss when he had walked JaeJoong back to his dorm, and nothing had been the same since.

They dated throughout college, bought an apartment together afterwards, were engaged for a year and then eventually gotten married in California where gay marriage was legal. YunHo had went on to take care of his fathers business, and JaeJoong wrote short stories for local newspapers, (more to keep his degree in literature from becoming a complete waste) and took care of home. To anyone else it would look like they were the perfect couple and that they were very happy and everything was well, but JaeJoong knew better. Him and YunHo's marriage was falling into shambles around him and he had no idea how he was going to piece it back together, if he even could.

All they did was argue, and that was only when YunHo decided to come home, usually he worked late, insane hours that kept him from JaeJoong more often than not. JaeJoong complained about this to YunHo every time he got the chance, but they seemed to be falling on death ears. JaeJoong was tired of the lack of communication and love between them, and wished things could go back to the way they were.

JaeJoong walked into the cafe and sat in the spot he frequented when he was still a student, a gentle rain had begun to fall and was pattering on the window. He ordered a sandwich and a glass of milk and stared wistfully out the window at the falling rain. JaeJoong was halfway through with his sandwich when someone came and took the seat in front of him. JaeJoong looked up to see a man with the most abstract haircut talking animatedly to the waitress that had served him earlier.

He stared at the man, unable to take his eyes off of him. He had such a silly look about him, but his features were still incredibly attractive. His eyes were a deep brown and shun with humor, and his smile was simply amazing. The waitress walked off and the man turned around and threw that dazzling smile over in JaeJoong's direction.

"I'm sorry if I disturbed you, but I always sit here and well you were already sitting in the seat I normally occupy..." he trailed off shrugging off his wet jacket, droplets of water that clung to the ends of his crazy hairstyle dripping onto the table.

"It's all right, I haven't been here in such a long time but when I did come here, I always sat in this seat by this window."

The man laughed. "What are the odds of that?" He held his hand out, "my name is Park YooChun, pleased to meet you."

JaeJoong took his hand smiling a real smile for the first time in a long while. The waitress returned and the two finished their orders in silence. JaeJoong got up to leave at the same time YooChun stood up to put his jacket back on.

"Where are you headed?" YooChun asked.

JaeJoong shrugged. "Home, I guess."

"You don't sound too enthused."

"I'm really not, it's pretty lonely there."

YooChun looked sad for a second as he watched JaeJoong walk towards the exit. He ran over before JaeJoong could open the door and gripped his arm.

"Its pretty lonely at my place as well, how about we go out to a club by the time we leave there we'll be so drunk it won't even matter."

JaeJoong was hesitant for a second:

("I'm sorry boo but I'm swamped, I won't be able to make it home until later, if that."

"...but I got dressed up and everything, your job always keeps you so busy we never get to spend any time together!"

"I'm sorry Jae--but if I want to continue being able to provide for us, I have to make the necessary sacrifices.")

"All right," JaeJoong agreed.

The two had spent a good portion of the night going from one club to the next, only staying long enough to grab a drink and a dance. YooChun was like a shadow, slinking from one place to the next, like a man on a journey.

"It's getting late..." JaeJoong slurred. They had just left the last club of the night; stumbling, clinging to each other and laughing stupidly at stray cats that whizzed by.

"I should really be getting home."

YooChun laughed drunkenly and slipped an around JaeJoong waist, pulling the smaller man into his chest. YooChun was quiet for a long second as he buried his face in JaeJoong's thick hair, the gesture made JaeJoong still, but his inebriated mind was working too slow for him to make sense of YooChun's motives. YooChun kissed JaeJoong's neck without warning--JaeJoong pulled away, his eyes burning as they stared back into YooChun's.

YooChun kissed him, deeply and hotly and JaeJoong melted into it. His tongue tangling with YooChun to mix with the laced liquor of his spit. YooChun somehow managed to open the back door of his car, and JaeJoong slipped inside--he was so drunk and aroused that he began to strip, taking his shirt off seductively and motioning for YooChun to come closer. YooChun did just that, dipping his head to suck on JaeJoong's nipples and lave at his belly button. JaeJoong tilted his head back, his fingers gripping and tangling in YooChun's hair. A gasp escaping his lips. When YooChun entered him, JaeJoong felt as if he would catch flame, burning from the inside out; they stayed hugged close together afterwards, breathing heavily, waiting for the moment to pass.

JaeJoong awoke the next morning with the headache of a century, and rushed out of the bed he shared with YunHo to go empty his stomach--he just barely made it. YunHo appeared at the door shirtless and rubbing his eyes, a deep frown on his face.

"I take it you went out last night," YunHo stated.

JaeJoong stood up rather shakily and walked over to the sink to clean his face off. YunHo entered and turned on the shower, he then leaned over JaeJoong to take out some aspirin.

"I've never known you to drink."

"I don't anymore," JaeJoong began slumping down onto the toilet seat and gratefully taking the aspirin from YunHo. "I use to drink like crazy when I was a teenager, could hold my liquor pretty well too--" he glanced up at YunHo through his matted bangs. "I stopped after I met you though."

YunHo didn't respond, just began to quietly strip JaeJoong. YunHo left soon after and JaeJoong was left alone with his thoughts. Memories of his body rocking against YooChun's, their wet kisses, and the absolute completion he had felt once it was over. JaeJoong felt sick to his stomach. Him and YunHo had been together for nearly a decade, he had never so much as glanced twice in another man's direction, and he had cheated on YunHo with a complete stranger. He had just been feeling so lonely.

JaeJoong closed his eyes. What was he going to do? How could he possibly tell YunHo that he had given into temptation, to his own anger towards him, to the loneliness inside of him and allowed himself to get drunk enough to have casual sex with someone he had only just met. This momentary lapse in judgment could cost him his relationship and future with the love of his life.

"You want some breakfast YunHo?" JaeJoong asked. YunHo had finished cleaning himself and had entered the kitchen dressed rather casually. JaeJoong stared at his husband for a second, unable to believe that the other man wasn't dressed in a shirt and tie.

"No need, we can go out to breakfast. I was thinking Cafe Seoul."

JaeJoong dropped the pan he had been holding. YunHo rushed over to see if JaeJoong was all right. "You OK Jae? Why are you so jumpy all of a sudden?"

"I'm not jumpy, I'm just--"

"This is why I need to get you out of this house Jae. When you called me last night, I spent the whole rest of my day stressing over what I had said to you. You were right, we don't spend enough time together, and I would never forgive myself if I pushed you away." YunHo ran his fingers along JaeJoong's fringe, and then down the side of his face.

"I love you Jae, and I'm willing to do anything to prove that to you."

JaeJoong felt the tears sting and looked away.

"I know you love me YunHo, you don't have to prove anything to me."

YunHo gripped JaeJoong's chin and forced the other man to face him, he then kissed him, softly.

JaeJoong felt as if he was going to have a nervous breakdown when him and YunHo entered Cafe Seoul. YunHo immediately leading him over to the table he use to always occupy.

"Remember when we first met?" YunHo said, throwing JaeJoong a loving smile from across the table. "You were sitting right there reading a book, and I remember thinking you were the most beautiful person I had ever laid eyes on."

"I remember," JaeJoong said, his voice sad. "You never told me that though."

"I was too embarrassed, and I thought you would think less of me if I told you that. It's not everyday a man gets thought of as beautiful."

"I guess you're right."

YunHo furrowed his brow. JaeJoong had been so withdrawn and moody, and he really couldn't understand why, he thought JaeJoong would be pleased that the two of them were finally spending time together. The door to the cafe opened and JaeJoong glanced up to see YooChun enter the store. A strange glow about him, and an egnimatic smile on his face. YooChun paused and turned his head, meeting JaeJoong's eyes dead on. YunHo noticing JaeJoong's attentiveness turned around, to spot a tall, lean and very handsome dark-haired man, standing next to a much shorter, cupid faced man. His mouth tightened in the next instant and he whirled on JaeJoong making the other man jump.

"Do you know him?" YunHo asked, his tone heated.

"This isn't the place to talk about this YunHo--"

"Do you know him?" YunHo repeated, letting JaeJoong know that there would be consequences if he didn't answer the question.

A loud SMACKing noise echoed throughout the small cafe, and every head turned in the direction of it. JaeJoong's eyes were wide and full of tears as he held his stinging cheek. YunHo was livid, and he stood up and stormed in the dark-haired man's direction. The man tensed, just before YunHo's fist connected sharply with his jaw sending him to the floor. The shorter man who had accompanied him let out a sound of outrage as he leant over to help his friend.

"Bastard! If you ever come near my fiance again, I'll kill you!" YunHo spat.

He turned around and stormed back over to JaeJoong, yanking him up roughly by the arm. He pulled them both out the cafe, slamming the door closed behind them hard enough to shatter the glass.

The atmosphere back at the apartment they shared was very tense. YunHo refused to speak further about JaeJoong's adultery and when they made it back (JaeJoong was surprised that the two hadn't got into an accident with how reckless the other man had been driving) YunHo went straight into their apartment's guestroom and locked himself inside of it. JaeJoong hovered outside the locked door, spilling out apology after apology until his voice was shot. When he realized that him apologizing was getting him nowhere, JaeJoong settled himself in the living room--he eventually fell asleep with tears on his face.

JaeJoong was shaken from his sleep much later by YunHo, who was on his knees in front of him.

"YunHo--" JaeJoong startled, trying to shake the sleep from his system.

"Let's go to bed," YunHo just said.

"You're not mad anymore?"

"Of course I'm mad, I'm furious--but I know I drove you too it."

"YunHo no--this is completely my fault, I chose to sleep with him--"

"I know you did, but I played a factor in that decision. If I had been doing right by you and not neglecting you, you would have never had any reason to do what you did." YunHo sighed. "You've never done anything like this before, and because I blame myself more than I blame you, then I can forgive you."

YunHo then looked JaeJoong directly in the eye.

"Never do something like this again, I won't forgive you a second time."

JaeJoong nodded his head.

"I have no intention of ever hurting you like this again YunHo, I love you--more than anything in the world."

("I know its real mother, me and YunHo love each other and once I'm out of school we're going to move in together."

Ms. Kim sighed as she took in what her son was saying. YunHo stood off to the side, a little nervous but resolute. His whole coming out had not went over too well with his parents, especially his father, but he was determined to make things work between him and JaeJoong, because it was JaeJoong whom he wanted to spend the rest of his life with. Ms. Kim glanced over at YunHo, sizing him up.

"Are you sure son? I mean this is a very serious decision you are making, you're both... men."

"I think I know that mother, but I don't care. You've always known I've never looked at girls that way."

JaeJoong's mother gave him a small smile and nodded her head. "Yes, this I did know. I suppose you have my blessings, there's not anything I can do to stop you after all. I just want you to be happy."

"Thanks mother," JaeJoong said, relief filling his voice as he embraced his mother. Him and YunHo left his qauint apartment in lighter spirits concerning their future. YunHo took JaeJoong's hand and entwined their fingers, leaning over to kiss JaeJoong's temple.

"I'm glad she accepted it, I really wasn't going to take no for an answer."

JaeJoong laughed. "Neither was I."

JaeJoong frowned when YunHo suddenly let go of his hand and got down on one knee in front of him. JaeJoong felt all the blood rush to his face as he realized what YunHo was doing.

"YunHo--"

"JaeJoong, I know its a little soon and I really don't have a ring, but when the time comes would you be willing to marry me?" YunHo asked his face flushed and uncertain. JaeJoong pulled YunHo into a deep, probing kiss, his heart racing.

"Of course.")

The next day JaeJoong sat in his shared kitchen drinking a cup of hot coffee and looking over the morning paper. This particular morning after had been pretty awkward, since nothing had been forgotten. YunHo opted to kiss JaeJoong's forehead instead of his mouth, and left after uttering a very brief farewell. JaeJoong had set to tidying up their apartment, and figuring out what he was going to make YunHo for dinner. It was going to take a while before the trust they shared returned and their relationship became natural again, but JaeJoong was willing to wait.

A knock at the door roused JaeJoong from his thoughts and he went to answer it.

He did not expect to see his one night stand, standing on the other side. JaeJoong took a step back.

"Don't be alarmed, I didn't come here to try anything, honest."

JaeJoong was still a little unnerved.

"Then why are you here?"

"I actually came to apologize, you told me all about your husband and yet I still took advantage of you--"

"You didn't take advantage of me, I was a willing participant, if anyone should have stopped it, it should have been me."

"We are both to blame. I was a wreck that night, and just wanted to forget all my problems. I guess we were both two lonely souls who needed an escape."

"I guess so." JaeJoong agreed.

YooChun turned his head and looked off into the sky, which was a clear blue.

"I'm off, I just wanted to say good-bye and make sure that everything was all right between you and your husband."

"Everything is fine, well as fine as it can be. It'll take time, but we'll move forward... where are you going?"

YooChun smiled, and JaeJoong felt his heart stir in his chest. YooChun shrugged an odd light shining in his eyes.

"Somewhere."

He turned around and without another word walked off, JaeJoong watched him, wondering why he felt like he would never see the other man again. JaeJoong's feeling of unease was justified later on that day when he recieved a phone call from YooChun's ex-boyfriend Kim Junsu:

"I'm friends with your husband, I wanted to talk to you about YooChun. Did you know him?"

"Not really, I mean we met by chance and... we ended up sleeping together."

Junsu was quiet for a long moment, and then he said: "I see..."

"Is that why you called? I mean, I didn't mean for it to happen. YooChun really loves you--"

"It's not that. I broke it off with YooChun that night, officially."

"I'm sorry." JaeJoong said and he really meant it.

"It's all right," Junsu waved off, his voice sounding incredibly sad. "It was just that I was so surprised when YunHo hit ChangMin--but, for a split second while ChangMin was sprawled out on the floor, I saw YooChun's face and everything made sense. I don't blame you."

JaeJoong was surprised. "Blame me?" He repeated, a little confused.

"Oh--you don't know," Junsu's voice became very somber in the next instant and JaeJoong thought he would break down and cry over the phone. "YooChun is dead. He died in a fatal car accident early this morning."

JaeJoong didn't respond for a long moment, too shocked. He had just seen YooChun not too long ago, had just spoken to him, he could not possibly be dead. It just didn't make any sense. JaeJoong felt his eyes blur with tears, and gripped the receiver to keep from dropping it.

"...I really did love YooChun." Junsu spoke, breaking the silence. JaeJoong closed his eyes, and nodded his head even though Junsu couldn't see him.

"He loved you too."

"I'm sorry. YooChun had a way about him that touched people, because he wasn't a bad guy. I'm glad I got the chance to talk to you, but I really have to go, I have to start planning his funeral and I have to call his parents and let them know of his passing."

JaeJoong managed a good-bye and placed the phone back on the cradle. The tears fell from his eyes one after the other, like a steady stream of water. YooChun was gone.

("You have a great smile." Junsu commented, quite suddenly.

YooChun was surprised for a second and then he smiled.

"I smile a lot, to hide the pain."

"Really?" Junsu said, gripping YooChun's hand tighter. "I do that sometimes too--but yours is perfect, you were meant to smile." Junsu leaned closer to YooChun's face, and kissed that beatiful smile of his. "Always smile, it suits you.")

Opening the door to the home he shared with YunHo, JaeJoong stepped out barefoot into their backyard. Lifting one hand to sheild his face frome the glaring sun. It had been a year since his one night stand with Park YooChun and one year since the man's unfortunate death. Him and YunHo were finally secure in their relationship. YunHo finding it wrong to hold resentment for somone no longer living, forgave YooChun and thus fully forgave JaeJoong as well. JaeJoong found it impossible to forget about YooChun, even though he wished he could, so the pain of his passing wouldn't hurt so much. It was funny how he felt so much for a man he had only met once, but YooChun had left an impression on his heart that would never fade.

JaeJoong looked up at the sky, and remembered when YooChun had looked up at it that day. JaeJoong thought of YooChun's smile at that same moment, smiling down on him like the sun from heaven.