I went to Madison last night to see my loveee!
I already miss her so much. It's like everytime I see her, it just makes me want her so so so much more. Last night was great. I wish I would have asked her if I could come see her earlier that day though, then we could have spent more time together. So for future references, I will ask ahead of time.
She's really amazing though. So amazing. My little treasure, so to speak.

My stomach is growling uncontrollably this morning, and I am almost contemplating getting food. I should, but I think I'll just wait until I get home. I am so hungryyyy. Jessica and I texted throughout my math class and she told me to bring her food. I so would, too. She has a half-day today, and fall break the rest of this week. Whereas, I don't really get a fall break. I wish I had one. And that I could steal her away for a while.

I wore my coat this morning in the car, then abandoned it once I got to the stadium. It was a bad idea. I knew it was a bad idea when I locked and closed the door to my Jeep. Because now, it's freezing balls on campus, but I have momentarily taken refuge in the sweet sanctuary of our lovely library. I just wish I had it with me for when I venture back outside and over to my history class.

I think I'm almost done with the technical part of my math project, which is good, considering it is due next Tuesday and some individuals haven't even thought about starting it. As for the rest of this week, it shouldn't be terribly demanding. But give it another week or two, and I'm sure it will be. I'm beginning to learn that's how things work. You have a few good weeks, then a few bad weeks that come right back and sneak up on you and cling to your ass, tormenting you incessantly.

I am having all sorts of aches and pains. Is this a sign that I'm getting older? [As Jessica decided to inform me last evening of how close twenty and thirty really are!] Or that the weather is getting colder? I woke up this morning and my back was all achy and right now I'm having butt cramps, but I don't really think that's a sign of anything haha.
 
I have this miraculous love-hate relationship with aging. I want to be older, granted, I want to know all the little things [and hopefully the best things have yet to happen, but some amazing things have already occurred] that happen to me and the important people in my life, how time progresses, how I end up. I sort of wish time travel were actually possible, or at least decently close to being invented. I would travel back in time, probably to the twenties, and just check out everything and see all the amazing things that have occurred throughout the progression of time. But I wonder, would I go into the future and find out where I end up? Or would I just let it be an element of surprise? I think it's meant to be a surprise for a reason. I mean, if you knew everything that was to happen, would you want to change it, or would you just want to live it up? I don't know. I think I would want the future to be a surprise, despite the fact that I am uber eager to see what happens as we progress.

At the same time, I long to be a five-year-old again, with no responsibilities and the only thing I was probably worried about was where my stuffed animals and colouring pages were and what I was having for dinner that evening. I long to be the little five-year-old that would scrape their knee up and my mom would then come to my side and kiss it and make everything all better. I miss those days. It's funny though, because I don't really recall much before the age of nine or so. How my memory fails me. But really, one should love their memories. I do. The good ones, at least.

This is sort of a ridiculous rant, and I apologize for it's haphazard jumping from tangent to tangent, as I always seem to do.

Today is a beautiful day. It's cold, but pretty damn beautiful.
 
I wish you were here to sit with me under the trees and curl up in a blanket and watch the leaves fall with me.