Scott Burnside may be my favorite Hawks writer at the moment (COME ON STEP IT UP CHRIS KUC), but NHL "correspondent" Marcie Garcia also makes me happy with her fluff pieces. The feature she wrote last season about Seabs's and Duncan Keith's offseason habits pretty much solidified my adoration for those two. Anyway, if she were a ficcer she'd be the chick that writes happy pieces about, like, breakfast in bed and then aggressive snuggling.

Unfortunately, it didn't work so well with Campbell and Huet, because they're both BORING OLD MEN:

Five Minutes with Brian Campbell
How has Chicago treated you thus far? Have you settled in yet?
Campbell -- I don't know where I live. I forget the name of my neighborhood. I guess more by the Gold Coast over there. The shopping down on the Rush and Oak area. My dad's been down for a week so we've kept busy.

I know you have to do something else [other than surf], Brian!
Campbell -- I'm not very exciting, I apologize. I do a little boating in the offseason. I have a wake-surf boat and we water ski and wake surf. I don't wake board because I'd kill myself, but I just try to surf a little bit and get better at that – just a little wake-surfing.

I'M CONVINCED HIS NICKNAME IS SOUPY BECAUSE HE'S AS DUMB AS A CAN OF CHICKEN NOODLE.

[...]

Five Minutes with Cristobal Huet

I hear you are pretty good at ping-pong.
Huet -- I am not an expert. I don't know what to say, but I can play.

OH. WELL, THEN.