Felt quite disgusted at what I gone through yesterday night. Lee called me up and asked if I'm free for supper. I knew something was up but I said ok. Our previous meet-up before Jason left for Aus was well, a plain disaster. Never in my life have I felt so pressured into doing something I didn't want to.  In my heart, I knew it's going to be about the Asiaworks basic training again but he has been a good friend so I didn't want to make things bad.

We ended up at Railway Mall Starbucks and the conversation went back to my life, what are my goals and how I would like to change it. I even asked Lee if I'm his pet project (to turn me into a "better" person.) On and on went the pitch on how good the Asiaworks basic training will help me find clarity. Yes, it sounded like a combination of a MLM sales person and a radical evangelist. It really made me uncomfortable. This went on till almost 3am in the morning. I could have just left anytime but i didn't want to make an ugly scene. I still think of him as a friend and that matters to me. Thinking back, I wanted to ask him if this is so important that he cares if he lose me as a friend with all the emotional blackmail.

There's no harm in going for it. Its true I have no excuses besides the time lost. Who doesn't know I have no life right? *rolleyes*
By the way, the course fees is a whopping SG$1200. There's a clause that says after completing all parts of the 5-day session, if one felt that one derieves no value whatsoever out of the training, one will be entitled to a refund of the tution fee
But I really think my feelings do count and is important to me. If I feel uncomfortable abt something, why should I go? Then goes the long story about getting me out of my comfort zone.

Anyway, I reluctantly and unwillingly signed the application form under undue pressure...its almost 3am and I have to work in the morning not to mention I was sick and on MC in the afternoon. But I had him put down his credit card number for payment. He volunteered and since he has so much faith in the course, then so be it. But when he asked after writing down the details, how am I going to pay him back, it basically just crushed the already little faith I had.

This whole morning, I couldn't get over it and kept thinking of ways on how I can get out and ended up not getting much work done. Lucky nothing to rush and HK office is closed due to typhoon. I'm just very unhappy that I do not know how to say NO.

Edit 24Aug08: I was just reading through the entire prospectus for the Asiaworks Basic Training and I realised that there's a whole lot of other documents required to be signed which I did not. I'm surprised my application has been processed according to Lee when I smsed him that morning without all these. Shall wait and see what happens. If everything goes through, then there's really something wrong with this organization.

Lee CR: if you still think of me as a friend, never bring this up ever again regardless the outcome...