The Voyages of the Starship DM Infinity (The Office/Star Trek: The Next Generation)

...Captain Scott walked into Ten Forward.  He desperately needed to talk to Philbin, the bartender there.  Philbin was the only person in the whole world who understood him. As the Captain sipped from his glass of pink synthahol, he began to pour out his soul.  "I just don't know what to do!  First, I have some kid trying to steal my thunder.  And then I feel like Starfleet's constantly out to get...