Customer WTF's

I've tried to write these as close as they actually happened. Both are really just Customer WTF's and very weird. As well as everything else I do I also do a campaign for an animal charity. We're just overflow so rarely get calls. Except lately with Christmas and all people tend to get weepy and animal loving. Crazy Man - Rawr I'm a crazy man Me- Me *waves* Me - Thank you for calling My ...

I am jubilant. Mother has wet herself.

Despite his incessant whistling, I offer the man in the snazzy boiler suit a cup of tea. He seems an unlikely burglar - wrong nose - so I don’t pry with the particulars of his presence in my hallway. There is a brief conversation, rooted in the subject of the terrifying noises emanating from the comedy-writing Buddhist’s room. Ten minutes later, mother emerges at my door, weeping. “I’m going to ...

ok, so i'm going to open up with a conversation i had with a friend on the way to a show in vancouver at 4 in the morning while gasing up. Me: fuck i gotta piss darius: go piss man me: (gets out of van and just waits around) Darius: i thought you had to piss man me: i doo reaalll! fucking! bad! darius: well go me: you don't need me around? darius: i'm pumping gas mike. i don't need your ...

A couple of remembered sucks...

Long time lurker, first time poster... you know the drill. ^^ *waves* I have a couple of remembered sucks, one from a couple of months ago when I was working at XXI (sister company of Forever 21), another from when I worked at Best Buy. Script format FTW. 'Cause it's easier. ^^; Me- That employee over there who is not looking forward to working till two thirty in the morning. BL- ...

HEY HYENA DICK

me: LOL OH GOD MOST HILARIOUS HYENA MATING EVER me: OKAY me: THE ONE MOUNTS THE OTHER AND MAKES THIS "HUR" SOUND me: AND THERE ARE DUCKS QUACKING NOW IN THE BACKGROUND OH GOD THIS IS TOO FUNNY nick: LOL nick: so here's the question me: QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK QUACK ...

Resurrected.

This conversation is a dedication to all that I think is wrong with mankind these days. A says: u still working!!! Me says: of course A says: wow!!! A says: hardworkin man... really Me says: yeah A says: work work A says: i ll not disturb u Me  says:  okay A says: wat u wrkin on? Feel Free says: lol A says: sleeping. A says: u home na A says: good girl Me says: i know Me says:   A says: ...

Lavender KO

And so today me and Czarina decided to buck Shane for his black belt >=) Anyway... today was boooooring with a huge, big, yucky-ucky silent X. Stupid rain made everyone very very tired and dead. English: Sample Guide Questions: how to skin a lion pt.1 scalping a nun skinning a moth *reading out loud* Karen: This Kate: man Me: is Karen: Small. *all pause and burst out laughing* We're lions. ...

I don't wanna be fucking replaced. I realized that today, that was my fear. Like it has been for awhile. I need someone to be there with me, someone I can trust to be there. And sometimes I think it's gone. Which, I was wrong, because it never left.  My momma always if that you found a best friend, that a guy would never ever come between you guys. I realized that today, I found my best ...

me: ugh y do i like katelyn so much..... ziger: uh ziger: she's a man me: lol ur so gonna slap me for this, but i think if she was i'd still love her ziger: ............................... and...i think i really would...**head falls down** i feel so...broken and empty and dead. i want someone to slap me really really hard or to punch me or something. why can't she just like me that way? i could ...